Dollmanron
Super Freak
Why so depressing.
I’ve had a few comments about the attitude and tone of some of my posts over the last 6 months (not that any of my earlier posts were much better) so I thought I would explain. Maybe it will even do me some good.
Without going into a lot of personal details, I’ve had a rough life, with many up and down hill battles. My last battle (last job) put me over the edge and I had a nervous breakdown. I’ve been diagnosed now as having extreme depression, extreme anxiety disorder, agoraphobia, insomnia, possibly bipolar disorder and finally diabetes. My first two months of this were really bad, these last two months I have just got back to even being able to drive.
To get to the point, Supervision rode me for one thing after the other until my 90 day probationer period was over and Management beyond that. My Supervisor admitted to me that I looked arrogant and that he made it hard on me on purpose; I can’t help the way I look. About 5 months in I got hurt on the job and reined a streak of no loss time accidents for management. (It’s been over a year and I’m still getting Doctor bills that their workers compensation insurance provider want pay.) My only guess is that they changed their minds about me and wanted to make me quit; when that didn’t work they just started writing me up for anything and everything they could justify. There was a Union at my job, but they always had an excuse for why they couldn’t or wouldn’t help me when I came to them with my problems. I finally just cracked under the pressure. Going over my local unions head has also been no help because it’s turned into me against them; I’m just a new guy so logic follows. The labor board was also no help, and no lawyer around here wants to touch my case; I think they’re scared of the company, its part of a very large and rich corporation.
My last day of work was back in April were I was clearing well over $2,300 a month (big money for me). For the last 6 months I’ve been getting less than 70% of that from a short term disability check. It’s caused a style of living change that’s been hard on my hobbies. This month I get nothing (Nov.), it’s only at the beginning of Dec. that I get anything from the government and it’ll only be 50% of what I was getting when I was working. The lawyers I had to get will even take half of that for their fees, which will make my families Christmas a sad one. With the regular bills, medicine and my doctor bills I want have any hobbies left that I can afford.
I try to think that there are individuals and families that are worse than me and mine, but it doesn’t help much. Being scared and worried has now turned to anger and bitterness and it comes out when I think of what they’ve done to me, my family, and the loss of so many things that were dear to me. It doesn’t help to see so many thing that I like and want, knowing that I once could afford them easily, but now can only look at them and feel cheated.
So that’s it, I’ve got nothing to enjoy but what I already have (for however long I can afford to keep it) and what little I can get by with when I can ignore something else I should be paying for.
I’ve had a few comments about the attitude and tone of some of my posts over the last 6 months (not that any of my earlier posts were much better) so I thought I would explain. Maybe it will even do me some good.
Without going into a lot of personal details, I’ve had a rough life, with many up and down hill battles. My last battle (last job) put me over the edge and I had a nervous breakdown. I’ve been diagnosed now as having extreme depression, extreme anxiety disorder, agoraphobia, insomnia, possibly bipolar disorder and finally diabetes. My first two months of this were really bad, these last two months I have just got back to even being able to drive.
To get to the point, Supervision rode me for one thing after the other until my 90 day probationer period was over and Management beyond that. My Supervisor admitted to me that I looked arrogant and that he made it hard on me on purpose; I can’t help the way I look. About 5 months in I got hurt on the job and reined a streak of no loss time accidents for management. (It’s been over a year and I’m still getting Doctor bills that their workers compensation insurance provider want pay.) My only guess is that they changed their minds about me and wanted to make me quit; when that didn’t work they just started writing me up for anything and everything they could justify. There was a Union at my job, but they always had an excuse for why they couldn’t or wouldn’t help me when I came to them with my problems. I finally just cracked under the pressure. Going over my local unions head has also been no help because it’s turned into me against them; I’m just a new guy so logic follows. The labor board was also no help, and no lawyer around here wants to touch my case; I think they’re scared of the company, its part of a very large and rich corporation.
My last day of work was back in April were I was clearing well over $2,300 a month (big money for me). For the last 6 months I’ve been getting less than 70% of that from a short term disability check. It’s caused a style of living change that’s been hard on my hobbies. This month I get nothing (Nov.), it’s only at the beginning of Dec. that I get anything from the government and it’ll only be 50% of what I was getting when I was working. The lawyers I had to get will even take half of that for their fees, which will make my families Christmas a sad one. With the regular bills, medicine and my doctor bills I want have any hobbies left that I can afford.
I try to think that there are individuals and families that are worse than me and mine, but it doesn’t help much. Being scared and worried has now turned to anger and bitterness and it comes out when I think of what they’ve done to me, my family, and the loss of so many things that were dear to me. It doesn’t help to see so many thing that I like and want, knowing that I once could afford them easily, but now can only look at them and feel cheated.
So that’s it, I’ve got nothing to enjoy but what I already have (for however long I can afford to keep it) and what little I can get by with when I can ignore something else I should be paying for.
