Mark VII Stealth/Relationship Problems

[kiwiatlarge]

Keep working on her bro, and this might be your future wedding..

 

[chewdeezy]

This can't be real life. How can someone not know a figure from SSC is coming doe?

 

[Jeff12burq]

You all realize this guy pretended to be a mod more than once, right?

He's full of ****. Hell, he might not even have a gf.

Man you really have to get over that. If you knew the reason why I had to do it, you would understand.

But it's time to move on.

 

[Jeff12burq]

I still think (see my long-*** reply in the last thread) she displays some red flags, but hey, it's your life.

I also think (based only on what you've revealed) that you're both infatuated with each other and like each other a lot, but I'd balk at describing it as "love" as of yet. That's okay; that's how love starts but try to keep some perspective.

I speak as a 42 year old who has lived with three different women and had other girlfriends...err...not at the same time...both good and bad. But you're both still young.

As already discussed, think about how your life "presents" and how you allocate your resources. Don't overdo it on the toys, bla bla bla.

My own girlfriend (soon to be fiancee) is fiscally conservative and has only a passing appreciation (at best) for this hobby of mine.

For four years we've had separate bank accounts and finances, with one joint account for convenience. We help each other when need be, some bills are shared, others our individual responsibility. It works well.

I make sure everything from renovations to vacations are paid first, (fixed expenses goes without saying) and then I go to town on whatever I want after that.

I value experiences over material possessions, and I do keep a strict control over my own collection in that I don't like having too much stuff and will sell off items (even items I like) if I decide something else is more desirable. I would never try to have everything and I definitely appreciate a small collection more than a large one.

So I'm financially responsible, our finances are joint only where necessary, and I take care of "real life" (wine tours, travel, renovations, savings etc.) before I burn the cash on action figures. That's how it works for us.

And make no mistake, I'd give up this hobby in a second if I needed to. My relationship and my life are infinitely more important than anything pop-culture or fandom related. But only for sensible reasons.

Completely agree. Priorities first and then comes the fun stuff. And I like what you said about how you value experiences over material possesions. I'm the same way.

I'm right there with you...hopefully we won't ever have to make that decision though

 

[Jeff12burq]

You just described a gold digger to a t. The fact that you can write all of this and still miss the fact that all this girl cares about is money blows my mind.

My girlfriend bought a Hulkbuster for me. Because she loves to see me happy. I bought her a ring because she makes me happy (haven't proposed yet.)

Love is happiness. You should never have to explain your finances. Ever. Especially this early on. You're oblivious if you think this is a building block to a strong relationship. If she can't trust you with your finances this early on, something is obviously wrong. (YOUR finances are none of HER business.) Best of luck, though.

Your perception of her being a gold digger could not be any more inaccurate.

In my first post (which was moved elsewhere to the sandbox), I mentioned that her parents had fights over money mismanagement which resulted in their seperation. So, she is very careful with her money and was concerned that I was mismanaging mine.

Oh, and btw good luck to you man Any idea how you're going to propose? Was the Hulkbuster a birthday present or did she just surprise you?

 

[epitaph04]

There's some interesting advice in this thread. Youre either gonna live happily ever after or your life will be ruined soon. Good luck!

 

[Taibhse]

Leopards never change their spots.. because of that, relationships either work or they do not.
If either side believes leopards can change their spots, or be turned into a chipmunk.. then the question is merely when, not if, the relationship will fail.


Know Your Mammal -

Chipmunk






Leopard

 

[Brainiac]

There's some interesting advice in this thread. Youre either gonna live happily ever after or your life will be ruined soon. Good luck!

Awesome

 

[Y4NK33 PL4N3T]

This thread deserves a sticky.

 

[Free]

This may come off as harsh, but I feel bad for you. Too early in the relationship for all this drama. She may not be a bad person, but she sounds like she comes with a lot of baggage. That may not be her fault but the fact remains. I get the feeling that you guys will be spending more time working on the relationship than actually enjoying the relationship. And by "working on the relationship" I mean YOU making sacrifices to pamper her needs.This girl walked out on you twice now? Yelled at you and accused you of lying? And got you to reveal your entire financial situation by essentially forcing your hand to do so if you wanted the relationship to continue? Hook, line, and sinker my friend.

Good luck to you though. Hopefully I'm wrong and you guys live happily ever after!

 

[Solidus]

Don't mean to sound harsh, but this story isn't going to end well. There are way too many red flags, and let alone, behavior that would turn away a lot of guys with more common sense. She's got you on a string, and you've got no control over the relationship. Showing your personal finances (when you're not even getting married), and desperately seeking her approval on your collecting habit... that's just taking it too far. I'm guessing she must be incredibly beautiful or incredibly good at doing other things.

 

[SaintSoy]

I'm guessing she must be incredibly beautiful

"They're all beautiful until they're snarling after your trust fund like a pack of ravening wolves."

 

[GDZILLA95]

Man you really have to get over that. If you knew the reason why I had to do it, you would understand.

But it's time to move on.

Sorry man, but pretending to be a mod(a lie), is not cool. Don't care why you HAD to do it, so no there is no understanding it. It was a lie. As far as a girlfriend is concerned, she either accepts you for who you are or she doesn't. That includes your collecting and the money you spend on it. If she gets mad every time you buy a new figure, then it's time to move on a find a new girlfriend.

 

[Shawpaw]

^^^^^Man, things starting to heat up *grabs popcorn*

 

[LipSmack]

This thread is awesome, and Fran!! Whats up man? Long time

As for Jeff... Those were some funny "assistant mod" no "assistant to the mod" days, like a less funny dwight shrute

And yeah, dont believe anything he says

 

[bransen2099]

^^^^^Man, things starting to heat up *grabs popcorn*

Can you please pass some over here? This is getting amusing

And yeah, dont believe anything he says

I don't believe anything on the internet anymore but still amusing

 

[Redwolf]

This thread is awesome, and Fran!! Whats up man? Long time

As for Jeff... Those were some funny "assistant mod" no "assistant to the mod" days, like a less funny dwight shrute

And yeah, dont believe anything he says

Who or what is dwights scrote?

 

[Motuxmen]

Sorry man, but pretending to be a mod(a lie), is not cool. Don't care why you HAD to do it, so no there is no understanding it. It was a lie. As far as a girlfriend is concerned, she either accepts you for who you are or she doesn't. That includes your collecting and the money you spend on it. If she gets passed every time you buy a new figure, then it's time to move on a find a new girlfriend.

What you said is true. But if they don't talk about it how exactly will she accept him for who he is? Going by this story all she had to go off where what appears to be a lot of spending on toys, that are not cheap, to the extent that he's got a go between because he exceeded the amount he was allowed to buy...obviously that may raise red flags if you don't appear to have a lot of money. And he obviously knew before hand, based on his first or second thread he started on the issue, that she had some family history of money destroying a relationship. Yeah, she will love him or she won't...doesn't mean love is all you need. You can be in love and still get divorced or break up.

Some of the advise in here is pretty crappy. (Not speaking to any one specific) and just because someone appreciates your hobby and spending more because it's not throwing the money away does not make them a gold digger. In fact a gold digger would never worry about how muc some guy spends on a couple toys. Even if those toys are islands. Based on this story, true or made up or whatever, her issue wasn't with the money, but what the money represents or represented from her point of view. There had to be red flags she saw to have that reaction. And unless you or I was there it's pretty unfair to make sweeping judgements about her, or him.

 

[The Iron Koob]

He pretended to be a mod what??? Why did he do that lol

 

[Clawwolf]

Don't mean to sound harsh, but this story isn't going to end well. There are way too many red flags, and let alone, behavior that would turn away a lot of guys with more common sense. She's got you on a string, and you've got no control over the relationship. Showing your personal finances (when you're not even getting married), and desperately seeking her approval on your collecting habit... that's just taking it too far. I'm guessing she must be incredibly beautiful or incredibly good at doing other things.

+100000. Well put.

Also, I would trust anything Geralt has to say. A Witcher's years are an unmeasurable pool of wisdom!