Just caught a bat...

[DarthNeil]

:blackbat :blackbat :blackbat
So, I'm sitting here in our computer room (lower floor) in the dark discussing the local newsletter reveals-- dividing my time between here and the TV room where the NBA game is on (go Cavs)... Suddenly, what I think is a really big moth flies over my ampled curly hair (enough to get a fleet of the rats with wings caught in it)... I turn on the light to unleash hell itself upon my mothy adversary, when low I behold a B--A--T.

Now, I could use this as a point of reference to start a life of superheroism... But rather I run out of the room making sure to close the door behind me-- a glass door that allows me all of the joy over the next ten minutes of watching my jailed (and possibly vampire fanged) attacker fly to fits. I adorn my armour (covering all biteable areas--) and grab my trusty weapon du jour (a big honking skillet with cover).

By the time I get ready for an Arthurian... well maybe a Tolkien... OK, maybe a Harry Potter dust-up the critter has given up escape and crawled under my soon to be three-year old's toy grocery cart. Pulling strength from the depths of my pancreas I enter-- tip the cart over and CRUSH HIM--- well, no-- I placed the top of the skillet over him (much to his consternation and dismay I can assume from the lovely scrathing sounds that he made once I slipped a large slice of cardboard under him for his journey-- Jurrassic Park style through the house to the easiest door to open with one hand).

Bats was released into the wild. I am left with two questions-- The second somewhat more important than the first.

Where did he come from? (ie where in my house is the "danger zone" and thus possible other encounters)

AND

Do I tell my wife (who is fast asleep upstairs along with the two little ones)?... As she's deathly afraid of bats and this'll make her A) want to wash and scrub everything and quite probably B) sell the house and move.

Thanks for reading. My heart's stopped racing now-- I'm going to check to see if halftime is over... Oh, and the lights are on.

Exciting newsletter tonight.

:blackbat :blackbat :blackbat

 

[Mesa]

glad you didn't have to kill him. I like sitting on the proch at dusk and watching the bats fly in my backyard. Their mostly beneficial for killing insects/mosquitos/etc. as long as they're not rabid, and I don't think that happens too often.

Don't tell the wife if it will freak her out. Why make her worry? Plus, she may put you on bat patrol to make sure no others break your penetrable home defenses.

 

[-Super Hans-]

are any windows open ???

 

[DarthNeil]

glad you didn't have to kill him. I like sitting on the proch at dusk and watching the bats fly in my backyard. Their mostly beneficial for killing insects/mosquitos/etc. as long as they're not rabid, and I don't think that happens too often.

Don't tell the wife if it will freak her out. Why make her worry? Plus, she may put you on bat patrol to make sure no others break your penetrable home defenses.

It's something like they eat twice their weight in bugs per night (or such-- someone feel free to correct me) so I don't mind having them on the property-- hurts the romantic midnight swims in the pool with the missus though ---

And, I think I am leaning towards keeping her in the dark. She'd be too freaked out if she knew.

are any windows open ???

No windows open (still too cool here) and I never leave any open anyway without screens. Either the attic or the basement is the culprit. The chimney has a fire insert in place so I don't see how the little bugger'd get in through that way.

 

[Studio49]

It's usually pretty easy to figure out where bats get in.

At any time during the evening, did a man or woman dressed in black with a thick slavic accent knock on the door asking if they could come in for a drink? After you turned your back to go to the kitchen, he/she disappeared right?

You gotta stop inviting them in.

 

[DarthNeil]

It's usually pretty easy to figure out where bats get in.

At any time during the evening, did a man or woman dressed in black with a thick slavic accent knock on the door asking if they could come in for a drink? After you turned your back to go to the kitchen, he/she disappeared right?

You gotta stop inviting them in.

I was intending on watching True Blood for the first time tonight but chose the NBA game instead--- an omen?

 

[The ill Jedi]

As Scott said, glad you didn't hurt him, also glad you didn't get bit. Good work Neil!!

 

[LOTRFan]

Only tell your wife if you like nudges on the hour every hour that she just heard a bat in the room ......

 

[creecher]

Just tell her you fell asleep on the couch and all you remember is a bat attack. It could have been a dream. Tell her to wash everything in sight. When she's nearly done, tell her to 'forged aboud id, let's pack up and move'. See who gets the skillet and assed out the door. Be careful of the bats out there won't you.

Anyway, very good and entertaining story.

 

[Studio49]

I think you should tell the wife. When she wakes up in the morning, tell her you found a bat inside last night, and it landed on your back and bit you. Ask her to feel the strange bump on your neck where it bit you, and when she reaches for your neck, bare your teeth, hiss and bite at her hand. Scaring the crap out of your spouse makes them love you more.

 

[DarthNeil]

I think you should tell the wife. When she wakes up in the morning, tell her you found a bat inside last night, and it landed on your back and bit you. Ask her to feel the strange bump on your neck where it bit you, and when she reaches for your neck, bare your teeth, hiss and bite at her hand. Scaring the crap out of your spouse makes them love you more.

How long have you been single?

 

[p!tu]

awesome thread!! glad your not a vampire!!!

 

[The Ween]

I love bats. Don't see as many as I used to. They can get in very easily through any nook and cranny. I wouldn't worry about it unless you keep getting them.

If you're wife is scared silly of them, I wouldn't trouble her with it, not unless you'll "get rewarded" for being a hero.

 

[uscmhicks]

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[DarthNeil]

awesome thread!! glad your not a vampire!!!

Well not yet anyway.

Thanks-- and congrats on your SDCC return gig.

 

[Agent0028]

I woulda used a box and Elmer's glue to catch it.

 

[Studio49]

How long have you been single?

I scare the crap out of my wife about once a month. Usually, I just hide in a room when I know she is coming that way soon. She swears like a sailor, then laughs until she cries or pees a little.

She actually started this twisted game in our relationship. She is petite, and can sneak up on anything with her light footsteps. She thinks it's hilarious to almost give me a heart attack.

I've often thought that the day she dresses up in a halloween costume and sneaks up on me is the day my heart will explode and I will leave the earth.

 

[Mesa]

At my sister's place back in Maryland, they live out in the country, and my brother in law showed me a cool trick. There a large flood lamps that light up the area so you can see a lot at night. Their driveway is gravel rocks. If you take a hand full of gravel and throw it up into the darkness, bats will swoop down on the falling gravel.

I imagine they think it's bugs and their sonar picks it up, but it's a cool trick. Tricks the bats nearly everytime. Which tells me, there are a LOT of bats in the country.

 

[DarthNeil]

I scare the crap out of my wife about once a month. Usually, I just hide in a room when I know she is coming that way soon. She swears like a sailor, then laughs until she cries or pees a little.

She actually started this twisted game in our relationship. She is petite, and can sneak up on anything with her light footsteps. She thinks it's hilarious to almost give me a heart attack.

I've often thought that the day she dresses up in a halloween costume and sneaks up on me is the day my heart will explode and I will leave the earth.

Romance is far from dead... But you may be if you don't get your blood pressure and heart checked on a regular basis.

Feel free to use my bat encounter as your own for the next romantic scarring-- er, scaring.

 

[The Entity]

Very nice work DarthNeil!!!

I hereby dub thee:

DarthNeil; Batslayer

(I know you didn't slay it but it doesn't hurt to exaggerate a little and it sounds better than batcatcher or something like that)