Went for another LONG walk today. I am getting up and taking them early, as it is getting pretty hot now, but I am feeling better today than I have in ages. I even checked my wieght, and have lost four pounds this week! So, all is not terrible. At least I have this, and my work is continuing, and my health isn't ALL bad, yet. Maybe I can head it off at the crossroads and just keep on plugging.
I am trying to see this as an inevitable thing and not react to it. I think I've known for a while though, that this was coming. About two weeks back, during another Ma episode, I woke up and thought I was gonna have a heart attack. I sort of committed then to walking more, and now, to just sorta putting my head down and ramming forward.
I have NO idea what the future holds, but that has been my life anyway. Nothing new about that. I try to make plans, and set goals, and the big ones never seem to gel. But at least I am proficient at rolling with punches. Maybe. We'll see. I know worse days have to be ahead, but I just am not worried about them anymore. I can't stay scared.
Anyway, thanks guys. All I can do is walk, try to do more workout stuff, not maybe Dark Artist frenzied, but certainly more than I am doing, and get myself back.
I have not given up. So, again, thanks. Updates as I can post em. You guys rock. I mean that.