RATE or REVIEW The Last Movie You Watched.

[Lejuan]

The Batman......3/10 (I'm being generous.)

Where do you place it among all the Batman movies?

 

[Otomofan]

Where do you place it among all the Batman movies?

Hmmm. Good question. Gotta be honest, I love Batman but as I've gotten older I've come to the conclusion that he's an "unfilmable" character. Make it too realistic, and you get a boring snoozer like Dark Knight Rises and The Batman. (Which was still ridiculous, even though it was "realistic"....I mean, just walking into machine gun fire and not having a scratch or getting hit in the face? Come on.)

Make it too much like the comics and it's gonna end up too campy and corny like Schumacher and Batman Returns.

I just don't think Batman works in live action. B:TAS was perfect cause it was a cartoon.

But I suppose I'd rank the movies as follows:

Batman 1989 (purely for aesthetics...the story is weak and Batman is Batman in name only. Keaton and Burton portrayed him as a pure psycho.)

Batman Begins (probably the closest to a "pure" Batman movie we've got, but man, I HATE the costume.)

The Dark Knight (purely for Ledger's Joker...Batman's suit is even worse in this, and he's really boring every time he's onscreen.)

Batman vs Superman (I actually liked it when I first saw it cause it really embodied the grimdark DC Comics of the 90s that I read growing up....but I think Affleck is a terrible Batman. He's just playing himself like he does in every movie.)

Batman Forever (this movie is trash, but they all suck from here on out so I'll rank this one here only cause I love the Panther suit, nipples and all)

Dark Knight Rises (I only saw it once. Kind of a mess of a movie.)

The Batman (lazy, boring, predictable re-hash of Nolan's movies. Hideous Batsuit and Batmobile. Sock mask for Catwoman. Penguin was stupid, Serkis is the worst Alfred ever on screen, and Paul Dano's performance was so over-the-top it was high school drama club level.)

Batman Returns (cool Batsuit but other than that this movie is unwatchable as an adult. Horrible, stupid performances from DeVito and Pfeffier as campy and overdone as the 60s TV show. Ridiculous nonsensical plot, stupid corny gags like Penguin's little Batmobile car, Christopher Walken's dumb character having more screentime than Batman....this movie really is a pile of garbage.)

Batman and Robin (hands down the worst big-budget movie I've ever seen. Horrifyingly bad on every single conceivable level. I hate this movie right down to my individual molecules.)



Is that all of them?

 

[Lejuan]

@Otomofan I was blown away by Batman Begins when I first saw it. It's actually my favourite suit, lol. But the "It's what I DOOOOOO" line nearly destroyed the whole experience, and having watched it again recently, it hasn't aged well.

I enjoyed exactly 33 minutes of The Dark Knight. And Gyllenhaal's Rachel had me thinking Batman's choice really wasn't a hard one.

The Dark Knight Rises was a coma-fest. I wanted all of them to die so I could get the hell out of the theatre, so the final scene was an especially disappointing reveal.

I don't like Burton as a director and never took to his take on Batman.

Schumacher, bleh.

I can't disagree on any of what you've said, but despite all of that I was pleasantly surprised when I saw it, mostly because I enjoyed Pattinson's performance and I embraced the stupidity of it all. It should've gone full R-Rating I reckon, ten-minute long fully animal and explicit sex scene with Kravitz and Pattinson would've made it a lot more interesting.

 

[Otomofan]

It should've gone full R-Rating I reckon, ten-minute long fully animal and explicit sex scene with Kravitz and Pattinson would've made it a lot more interesting.

 

[greygoose]

The Batman......3/10 (I'm being generous.)

 

[Alatar]

The Eternals 6.5/10. I can't quite give it a 7 but also feel 6 is just a bit too low...

For me nowhere as bad as most people feel. I'd still watch it before any number of other superhero films commonly rated in the lowest third tier.

As I saw it, the main problem the film has is in creating likable characters. If you don't like the characters you won't find yourself rooting for them. Or at worst you won't even even care what happens to them. (You'll get bored.) Most likeable for me were Sersi and Makkari.

The story itself I was okay with. It felt pretty standard now within the genre, but there was still plenty of room to make me care. Myths, legends, folktales all tell the same basic stories over and over again anyway, there's nothing new under the sun.

 

[Alatar]

Just before Eternals I saw The Batman. 7/10. The whole neo-noir/horror/suspense thriller fusion thing (Chinatown meets Silence of the Lambs) was an interesting take. But Batman himself was unintimidating even for only the second year of his career. I don't think it is particularly Pattinson's fault, but I felt all the important supporting actors except maybe Andy Serkis outshone him! The transformative and climactic moment of the terrorist saying "I'm vengeance" and Batman cutting the electric cable came off a little underwhelming to me. And I wasn't at all sold on the 180 degree flip from formerly being driven by rage and evoking fear in criminals to suddenly having an epiphany to need to inspire hope in the innocents/victims of society. To me (YMMV obviously!) that felt a little too close to contrived in order to make sure the film has a positive message in it.

I'm fine with this film on the whole. It didn't get me hyped any kind of way, though. For me it was more just a curiosity. I feel no need to rewatch. (Maybe if a black and white edition gets released, since it is a noir after all.)

I tend to concur with @Otomofan that the Batman character is actually more difficult than many want to acknowledge to place in the real world. It's a tough character to work with in that sense.

My favorite Batman is still hands down Snyder's Batfleck. And that's because once I saw it, and got over the initial shock, I realized I had absolutely wanted to see Batman done like that, i.e., deconstructed a la Watchmen and The Dark Knight Returns. It's a Batman for adults that tend to intellectualize, lol. But I'm aware that that makes my personal taste relatively niche. And I can actually respect if others even hated it. Because given what BvS is, it was bound to be polarizing. But anyway...

 

[JAWS]

Tentacles - 3 out of 10

I have not watched this one in 40 years. Now I Remember why lol I knew it was schlock and it’s what I was in the mood for, so it delivered there.

it did have one scene that I thought was kinda cool and another that I actually found somewhat intense. So I gave it an extra point.

 

[JAWS]

The Northman

7.0/10

Epic adult version of Anakin vs ObiWan fight, Valhalla and Frazetta style imagery, and of course Dafoe delivers but..

The villain and world building were really poorly handled and what happens to a movie when a hero doesn’t have a good villain….it gets a 7 score that’s what happens lol

Example…

Spoiler

A character disparages someone being from the “north” but it’s never explained why.

The villain is just explained away in a single sentence that he lost his kingdom and now this main villain is just a sheep farmer pretty weak. Why it took so long for the hero to take out the villain is a mystery then again the movie needed to be 2 hours and 20 minutes long to get there. The revenge plot reminded me of the Jane Punisher movie you will see what I mean when you go watch it but Punisher did it better lol and it was dumb that the villain couldn’t figure out who was responsible for the terror being done to him, gee it wouldn’t be the brute in the camp would it, dumb.

meh lol

Don’t get me wrong you should definitely go see it on the big screen but it’s not the movie I was expecting which was Braveheart but with Vikings and the movie really loses its way and gets boring in the middle. Don’t go in expecting a big battle there are none…zilch, nada!

As epic as that personal end battle was it wasn’t that long although by that point I wanted it to be over with already.

I would definitely not sit through that again.

Hmmm Everything in the trailer screams that this movie was made for my 15 year old self.

Expectations in check. First film I’m going to see after I clear from my covid isolation

 

[Otomofan]

My favorite Batman is still hands down Snyder's Batfleck. And that's because once I saw it, and got over the initial shock, I realized I had absolutely wanted to see Batman done like that, i.e., deconstructed a la Watchmen and The Dark Knight Returns. It's a Batman for adults that tend to intellectualize, lol. But I'm aware that that makes my personal taste relatively niche. And I can actually respect if others even hated it. Because given what BvS is, it was bound to be polarizing. But anyway...

My only problem with Snyder's Batman was the casting. I liked the suit (in stills anyway....the promo shots released before the movie looked amazing but I think it looked kind of awkward in motion.) My favorite comic of all time is Dark Knight Returns, so I was mega-pumped to see that version on film.

But as I said before, I just couldn't buy Ben Affleck as Bruce Wayne or Batman....not at all. He's just....Affleck. He's essentially the same character he played in "Gone Girl" (which I really loved by the way.)

I think one of the reasons I liked Cavill's Superman so much is cause he was essentially an unknown, and he really, really looked the part. I think they should have done that with Batman, too. But instead, it's always like a stunt-casting circus to see if they can get a bigger name every time. Michael Keaton was the only real risk, cause he was so well-known as a comedic actor. Everyone else it's just HUGE movie stars....Kilmer, Clooney, Bale, Affleck, and yes, even Pattinson. I don't see "Bruce Wayne" in any of those guys. I see the actor. I see Patrick Bateman, not Bruce Wayne.

Now that I think about it, that's probably the best thing The Batman has going for it, cause even though I'm aware of his work, I've never really seen much with Pattinson so he was more "believable" to me as Bruce Wayne. Unfortunately, the hideous costume turned me off to the whole thing.

 

[ebor]

Disney Lion King (original animated) 10/10

 

[jye4ever]

Hmmm Everything in the trailer screams that this movie was made for my 15 year old self.

Expectations in check. First film I’m going to see after I clear from my covid isolation

Ymmv

TNM was my most anticipated non superhero movie for this year with NOPE coming second.

The opening scene reminded me of Conan so i was like great this will be this generations Conan which it is in a way but a much slower version of it lol

Nothing in TNM touches the Conan War Paint scene for me although that end fight comes close but like I had mentioned by that point I was done I wanted it to end…I was sleepy lol

Arnold much more charismatic than Skars.

Don’t get me wrong TNM is DEFINITELY worth a watch!

I gave it a 7 afterall not a 2 lol

Hey it could be a 10/10 for you let us know….hurry lol

 

[Alatar]

My only problem with Snyder's Batman was the casting. I liked the suit (in stills anyway....the promo shots released before the movie looked amazing but I think it looked kind of awkward in motion.) My favorite comic of all time is Dark Knight Returns, so I was mega-pumped to see that version on film.

But as I said before, I just couldn't buy Ben Affleck as Bruce Wayne or Batman....not at all. He's just....Affleck. He's essentially the same character he played in "Gone Girl" (which I really loved by the way.)

I think one of the reasons I liked Cavill's Superman so much is cause he was essentially an unknown, and he really, really looked the part. I think they should have done that with Batman, too. But instead, it's always like a stunt-casting circus to see if they can get a bigger name every time. Michael Keaton was the only real risk, cause he was so well-known as a comedic actor. Everyone else it's just HUGE movie stars....Kilmer, Clooney, Bale, Affleck, and yes, even Pattinson. I don't see "Bruce Wayne" in any of those guys. I see the actor. I see Patrick Bateman, not Bruce Wayne.

Now that I think about it, that's probably the best thing The Batman has going for it, cause even though I'm aware of his work, I've never really seen much with Pattinson so he was more "believable" to me as Bruce Wayne. Unfortunately, the hideous costume turned me off to the whole thing.

You've got me thinking more about my own mind's eye Batman... and I realized going into BvS I was not wedded to any comic, TV, or film version of Batman. I'm older so I didn't grow up watching the DCAU. I grew up with the camp Adam West version on TV and the Silver Age comics. Which was fine when I was 6-12. But by the time I was an adolescent my perspective changed and I wanted something much more grounded so sci-fi, swords and sorcery, and high fantasy replaced superheroes. As a kid the best thing I found for Batman was the 40s serial. But that was such low production quality that I couldn't get into it. However it did make me long for a serious take on the character. I was an adult for the the 80s-90s Batman films, but they were all way too camp for my taste.

Anyway, I just assumed I'd never see the character done justice in an adult way. By the time I finally got around to watching the Nolan trilogy in 2014 it did nothing for me, unfortunately. I respected all the films as well made, but it just didn't light a fire under me at all. Bale is not at all as I have ever imagined Batman in my mind's eye. Although he did a fine job. Anyway, I really could take it or leave it. I had no desire to rewatch. I was struck, though, by Catwoman's quip to Batman that (paraphrasing) "this no-guns, no kill rule of yours... I don't think it's sustainable" or words to that effect. I did really appreciate that, lol. And note that shortly thereafter she proceeds to kill Bane in a rather satisfying way, dramatically speaking.

I really haven't watched Ben Affleck much tbh. I think I had only seen Reindeer Games (which I actually didn't hate but maybe I was just in a receptive mood when I saw it). After seeing BvS I went and watched Argo and The Town, and I was like, damn! Especially with his performance in The Town. As for as I'm concerned this guy is great in the role. Physically speaking, he certainly carried it off. The dude is 6' 4" and although I'm aware that they did some CGI to his abs in shirtless scenes (and all of those Michael Wilkinson suits for Bats, Supes, and Aquaman have sculpted padding) otherwise evidently Ben worked out like a beast to represent Frank Miller's brick ********* from TDKR.

Anyway, everyone has their own personal taste, and if his Batman doesn't get it for someone else that's cool with me. But for me so far he's checked off all the marks that I need. And re: actors playing themselves that's basically what some of the greatest actors that have ever lived such as Jack Nicholson, Robert Deniro, Al Pacino, et al., have always done.

 

[choombaz]

The Man From UNCLE (2017)
7/10
Really fun, underrated spy flick. Henry Cavill and Alicia Vikander are terrific in this. And for someone who cares almost nothing for clothing, the costumes in this film are just amazing.

 

[Lejuan]

The Man From UNCLE (2017)
7/10
Really fun, underrated spy flick. Henry Cavill and Alicia Vikander are terrific in this. And for someone who cares almost nothing for clothing, the costumes in this film are just amazing.

Very under-rated, but I think only fans of Guy Ritchie will say that. The costumes...the 60s just oozed off the screen, so good.

 

[JAWS]

You guys really subscribe to Paramount+ just for Star Trek?

Lol - no way

Ymmv

TNM was my most anticipated non superhero movie for this year with NOPE coming second.

The opening scene reminded me of Conan so i was like great this will be this generations Conan which it is in a way but a much slower version of it lol

Nothing in TNM touches the Conan War Paint scene for me although that end fight comes close but like I had mentioned by that point I was done I wanted it to end…I was sleepy lol

Arnold much more charismatic than Skars.

Don’t get me wrong TNM is DEFINITELY worth a watch!

I gave it a 7 afterall not a 2 lol

Hey it could be a 10/10 for you let us know….hurry lol

I thought it looked like this generations Conan also. So it’s good to keep my expectations in check. I was supper pumped for an opening night viewing but then Covid. So now I get to pump my breaks.

I knew we would not really get the next “Conan” no way is a modern film going to get a score like the one Conan had.

Did the film use real locations and real sets? Minimum cgi? That’s the other thing that makes Conan so great. The world building, brilliant set and production design. All shot in camera.

 

[jye4ever]

Lol - no way

I thought it looked like this generations Conan also. So it’s good to keep my expectations in check. I was supper pumped for an opening night viewing but then Covid. So now I get to pump my breaks.

I knew we would not really get the next “Conan” no way is a modern film going to get a score like the one Conan had.

Did the film use real locations and real sets? Minimum cgi? That’s the other thing that makes Conan so great. The world building, brilliant set and production design. All shot in camera.

It still used cgi but Shang Chi it is not lol

 

[xipotec]

Bill and Ted Face the Music. 6/10: Made me laugh more than expected.

You can see the ending in the first 5 minutes of the film…..

But some of the gags are pretty funny. Some are cringey.

 

[greygoose]

The Lost World: Jurassic Park - 9/10

I find myself watching TLW more often than JP these days. The film gets better with every watch. A great sequel!

 

[Cocoboloboy]

The Batman - 5/10

It was ok. I enjoyed it up until the end. That pretty much destroyed any real desire for a second viewing.
Pattinson is a great Batman and a terrible Bruce.
Loved the look of the suit and Batmobile.
Didn’t care for Gordon, Selina or Falcone. Very poor casting for Falcone IMHO and I think JT is an amazing actor.
I liked Penguin and Riddler a lot more than I expected to.

I’ll give the sequel a chance but I’m tired of movie makers trying to portray Batman as this brilliant symbol of hope. I’ll take a crazy, disturbed, damaged Keaton Bruce/Bats portrayal any day over that.