Terminator Genisys (July 1st, 2015)

[The Clown Prince of Crime]

Of course you're right, and that's what initially caused me to raise the question. Why do people "hate" T3 to the point of not wanting it to be a part of the trilogy. If you're going to isolate a movie down to its most lame screenshots then yeah, the sunglasses and hand stuff makes for some really stupid memes. But otherwise I don't see what's so offensive about Judgment Day happening. Everyone wants a future war movie but only if that future war gets prevented? Huh? T3 allowed for the continuation of that war that is part of this awesome time loop.

I think most people only wanted a future war film after T3. I don't think most people wanted that when there were only two films, but I can only speak for myself. After T3, I was like fine, bring on the future war film.

John and Katherine are bonding and T-850 says "Your levity is good, it relieves tension and the fear of death." That's pretty freaking funny. Because it's true, and the tactically minded cyborg would want to encourage such behavior but just saying the phrase "fear of death" is such an inherent "levity killer." The timing was perfect, their reactions were spot on. There are a good number of moments like that. I think you guys are writing off a respectable entry in the series.

That was so wrong on so many levels. He turned into some weird mix of Dr Phil and Mr Miyagi

 

[Khev]

Well, a future war movie wouldn't have to be a T2 sequel. It could have been a T1/T2 prequel. So T3 wasn't needed for that.

Prequels suck.

Oh and one more thing about Silberman. His "escape" cracks me up. He's on the pavement, Arnold opens fire, and Silberman runs up onto the grass and then back down to the pavement as he tries to get away. He actually goes full serpentine, very slowly, you or I could probably outwalk his run, to escape the Terminator gunfire.

Yes I laughed. And I like high-fiving velociraptors too. Well I don't like high fiving them, because that would be foolish, but I think it's cool when they high five each other or like T-Rexes and stuff.

 

[DiFabio]

Ten years ago, Khev, who ruled the future, sent an unstoppable argument in defense of Jurassic World to assassinate T2 Judgement Day's validity.

It failed . . .

Now after watching T3, Khev will try again.

As before, a lone defender, a protector of T2's honor, will be sent to protect it. The only question is, what will reach T2 first?

 

[Khev]

*Khev reads the post of his primary target, has an orgasm*

 

[jye4ever]

 

[jye4ever]

Terminator Genysis director is now saying that the trailers went too far, wasn't his call.

 

[Wor-Gar]

Terminator Genisys director pulls a 'Whedon'.

 

[The Clown Prince of Crime]

Terminator Genysis director is now saying that the trailers went too far, wasn't his call.

The film is not even out yet and he's already like

 

[a-dev]

 

[jye4ever]

Terminator Genisys director pulls a 'Whedon'.

lol yup

The film is not even out yet and he's already like

 

[YankeesFanboy]

Oh, it won't be that bad, youz guyz, stop overreacting. I have complete faith in (looks up director's name) Alan Taylor.

 

[jye4ever]

His Thor 2 wasn't so bad.

Well, except for Jane walking around other planets in jeans and t- shirt and no oxygen.

 

[The Clown Prince of Crime]

His Thor 2 wasn't so bad.

Well, except for Jane walking around other planets in jeans and t- shirt and no oxygen.

 

[EVILFACE]

His Thor 2 wasn't so bad.

Well, except for Jane walking around other planets in jeans and t- shirt and no oxygen.

They even hid the broke girls bewbs under layers of clothes.

Thor 2 blew chunks.

 

[jye4ever]

That should be illegal.

 

[YankeesFanboy]

Kat Dennings's jugs deserve a good hammering.

 

[Wor-Gar]

Kat Dennings's jugs deserve a good hammering.

I'm certain she gets them take care of regularly.

 

[Khev]

They even hid the broke girls bewbs under layers of clothes.

Thor 2 blew chunks.

EVILFACE! You love Conan the Destroyer. You of all people can appreciate Rise of the Machines. Right? Right???

Oh, it won't be that bad, youz guyz, stop overreacting. I have complete faith in (looks up director's name) Alan Taylor.

 

[a-dev]

These are the choice quotes from that T3 article I linked (and pretty much always link when it comes up)

Another thing is, how did T-X travel in time without live elements? T-1000's arrival was done offscreen to hide his nature, but it was confirmed that he arrived in a flesh coccoon. Not only he appeared offscreen, but the flesh cocoon part is in the novelization and confirmed by T2's creative consultant. They decided not to show it not to reveal the character too soon and not to confuse the audience. hence his arrival was offscreen

we later find out that the T-X is in a big hurry because it has 22 targets to kill in less than 24 hours. There are two major problems with that.

1: If Skynet really wanted all those targets killed, why give the T-X so little time to accomplish its mission? It's time travel, stupid! Send the T-X back days, weeks, months, maybe even years earlier! Why make the mission of the T-X any harder than it needs to be?

2: All these "important" targets are in Los Angeles, because of course, LA is the only place that anyone of importance to the Resistance could possibly come from. So if all these people are in LA, why is Skynet bothering at all? They are all in LA. They are in LA on the day of a massive nuclear exchange. They are GOING to DIE--no matter what the T-X does or doesn't do.
There is no way anyone in Los Angeles is going to survive a surprise nuclear attack. But of course, by ridiculous plot contrivance, these people would not only all survive a massive nuclear attack, but they would all become John Connor's lieutenants. So of course they all have to die. Good thing they all live in the same place, so that Skynet only has to send one Terminator

The T-850 has located a rather busy bar, the Desert Star. The T850 arrives at the entrance and encounters a bouncer perched on a stool by the front door. The bouncer is not the slightest bit surprised to see a completely naked man walk up. He acts as if he was expecting a nude man, and tells it that it's supposed to go around to the back. After scanning the man and deciding that his clothes weren't a match, the T-850 completely disregards the man, hitting the man forcefully with the door the T-850 enters the building--but not before aiming its head at the door prior to moving, as if head movements and walking cannot occur simultaneously.His moves are sudden and jerky, and he moves and walks more like Frankenstein and all the cliche robots and androids.
What made the terminator character different and unique is that it didn't act like 50's robots and didnt walk like one. 850 was everything terminators in the first 2 movies weren't

Suddenly, the T-850's head whips around, spotting what appears to be the only man in the entire bar. A gay stripper clad in designer leather is strutting on the stage, no doubt a worthy adversary to the T-850. The T-850 orders the man to take off his clothes. The man, who is busy trying to fulfill every gay stereotype on his checklist, says to the T-850, "Patience, honey," before tossing a glove at the T-850's face. After being briefly stunned by the bizarre display of over-the-top homosexuality, the T-850 steps onto the stage. The stripper becomes hostile, exclaiming to the T-850, "Whoa, *****! Wait your turn!", and checks off a couple more entries on his gay checklist. The Terminator again demands the clothes, setting up the infamous "talk to the hand" gag. The stripper tells the T-850 to talk to the hand, and the T-850 is stupid enough to actually do so! It grabs the stripper's hand and speaks into it as if it were a microphone. Sadly, this is just the first of many times the T-850 takes things too literally. Where an earlier model would have remained silent, this one says dumb things. A male stripper tells him to talk to the hand, so he does?! When the Terminator in T2 is told that it "forgot to say 'please'," it didn't rephrase its request. It just started laying on the violence.

We see the T-X walk up to the cat lady and ask if she is Katherine Brewster. What's the point in asking AFTER firing multiple bullets through her lungs? The T-X then proves that not only was asking unnecessary, but that Skynet seems to have everyone's blood sample on file. The T-X moves in to sample cat lady's blood. In a bizarre move, the T-X dips a finger into the blood pooling on cat lady's chest, and then licks the blood-soaked finger as if to flirt with cat lady. What possible reason could there be for requiring samples to be tested by the tongue?! Disregarding the whole ick-factor of it, the tongue is in such a recessed location that it makes it difficult to sample anything. Plus, the tongue is just more of the liquid metal. If the liquid metal can process samples at all, then why not use liquid metal at the fingertip to do it?

John Connor limps a few paces, and runs into his worst nightmare--a Terminator with basic psychology routines. Unlike the John Connor in T2 who could instantly recognize trouble and start running, John Connor just stands there while the Terminator strides toward him. The basic melodrama routines of the T-850 take effect, as it announces to John Connor that "it is time." John Connor is actually dumb enough ask if the T-850 is there to kill him. Yeah, sure John. Terminators always tell their victims when it's time to die, because shooting them in the face is just too subtle. If John Connor had any brains, he'd realize that he doesn't know what the T-1000's voice sounded like, because it didn't talk to people it was trying to kill. Instead of just answering John Connor's question, the T-850 immediately starts messing with John, postponing the response as long as possible while stepping right up to him to draw out as much fear as possible. Finally, the T-850 announces to John Connor that he must live, but suddenly grabs John Connor as if he got caught throwing rocks at cars

The EMT is unable to move the T-850, because "this guy weighs a ton". Of course. Terminators need to blend in with humans, so naturally they should be built so heavy that they can shatter asphalt and concrete on impact, and react like a stone statue when manipulated by humans. Contrast this with T2, where a 10-year-old boy was able to help a Terminator to its feet.

The basic etiquette routines of the T-850 kick in, as it says "excuse me" before using a fire axe as a hook to yank the T-X from the crane

At this point, we learn that the T-850 was checking John Connor for injury.

Of course.

If one is worried that someone is hurt, the best course of action is to wrench them around violently, grab their head and try to cause or aggravate a neck injury, and stare into one of John Connor's eyes as if it were some sort of status indicator. Naturally, the injury check overlooks the various injuries that John Connor actually has. Even the most incompetent med student knows that checking someone in such fashion could cause additional injury or death. We know Terminators aren't inherently bad doctors, as the Terminator in T2 stitched Sarah's cut in the garage while using only one hand. The T-800 never had to violently thrash people about to check them for injury. The T-850 is quite the medical downgrade.



It is ironic that the T-850 determines that John Connor exhibits no signs of brain trauma, since John Connor almost immediately displays the kind of confusion that could only be justified by a concussion or some other sort of brain injury.

John Connor:
Do you even remember me?

Sarah Connor? Blowing up Cyberdyne?

"Hasta la vista, baby." Ring any bells?

What, do you come off an assembly line or something?


John Connor remembers those details, but he forgot that the T-800 was horribly smashed, barely saved John and his mother from the T-1000, and then was lowered into molten steel to protect everyone from a ****** sequel like this one? How could he possibly think it's the same damned Terminator? Clearly, there is some misdiagnosed brain trauma involved, making the T-850 just as much of a quack doctor as it is a quack psychologist. And getting back to John Connor, how could it not occur to him that these things come off an assembly line?! The one that tried to kill his mother looked just like the one sent to protect him ten years later! And it's a machine! Why wouldn't it be produced on an assembly line?

The T-850 again whips out its arm, startling John Connor. But the T-850 merely opens the window separating the cab of the pickup from the shell. The T-850 asks Kate if she has any injuries, which ironically the chatterbox Terminator felt was too much effort to do with John. And of course, the T-850 must respond to everything, so when told to drop dead, it announces that it is unable to comply. Didn't these people watch T2? Terminators don't respond to every single stupid thing said to them. And whatever happened to economy of motion? There's no benefit to all those sudden, brutish movements. They're inefficient, they're not human-like, and they look stupid. It's not as if Kate was going to die if the T-850 didn't get that door open NOW. Cameron spoke with Arnold in the Terminator documentary that his smooth movement had a purpose. Not only it looked shark like, but also conserved energy. Sudden jerky movements are not only reserved for cliche robots, but also burn more energy.

It turns out that John Connor actually managed to hide successfully from Skynet, so Skynet had to settle for attacking John Connor's lieutenants, who all conveniently could be found living in Los Angeles just hours before the city gets wiped off the map by a nuclear-tipped eraser. Why is the T-X wasting time killing all these walking dead again?

It's amazing that a machine that undoubtedly has a slew of internal sensors doesn't notice anything wrong with its fuel cell until it starts smoking. Equally amazing is the fact that the T-850 decided to wait until the fuel cell was about to go critical before even contemplating how to remove it. What if John Connor didn't have that multitool? They would have long since missed any opportunity to pick up the necessary supplies.

We learn that Sarah Connor was cremated in Mexico, and her ashes were scattered in the sea by her friends. After having literally thousands of nightmares in which she was incinerated and blasted into ash by nuclear fire, it's only natural that she would make a conscious decision to have her body incinerated and reduced to ash by fire.

And of course, Sarah's friends stored the cache of weapons here at the cemetery in accordance with her will. There is a major problem with this. How does John Connor not know any of this? The weapons won't do Sarah any good, since they were put there after her death. Since they were put there in case of Judgement Day, it would have made sense for John Connor to know about them, since he's the one who's going to need them. It's not like he can't be trusted with that information. In T2 he knew about the weapons cache at the Salceda ranch, and obviously had great familiarity with firearms. There is no reason for him not to know about them since he learned about them since birth. Solely relying on the friends to tell him was a bad idea, as that information obviously didn't get to him before the new Judgement Day. He wouldn't be able to get to them after Judgement Day, since even if it wasn't hit directly by a nuke (it undoubtedly would have) the storage place would be completely inaccessible due to high levels of radioactive fallout in the entire region. It's surprising that the T-850 even knew to look for them here. Even if Sarah's friends survived Judgement Day and eventually found John, the cache would be so worthless as to not be worth mentioning. After all, even if somehow the cache survived, finding it among a city-sized pile of ruins would have been impossible. Even if they did end up mentioning it, it's not enough for John to know. Kate would have to be told as well, otherwise she wouldn't know to tell the T-850 about it.

As John blathers on, he says he never really believed that Judgement Day had been averted? Really? John seemed quite convinced in the pickup truck, when he insisted that the T-850 shouldn't even exist. But if he really didn't believe it, why the hell was he living somewhere that was GUARANTEED to be nuked to oblivion in the event of nuclear war?

Meanwhile, Kate has been formulating a plan. Since John and the T-850 have blown opportunity after opportunity to properly explain the situation to her, Kate is still treating this as a kidnapping. She makes a sudden grab for a Glock pistol. Although she has no way of knowing initially if the gun is loaded or not, to her credit Kate thinks to rack the slide first. The fact that it does not remain locked back upon cycling is a pretty good indicator that there were bullets in the magazine.

The T-850 is caught completely by surprise by Kate's action. It rises up and takes a surprisingly defensive posture, as if it's worried about being shot or something. This is a far cry from the Terminator in T2, which looked and acted absolutely fearless when staring down the muzzle of a shotgun. After a brief standoff, the T-850 makes a move for the gun, resulting in Kate firing before the T-850 can get the gun out of the way. First off, how did the T-850 manage to get shot? Average human reaction time is close to 1/4 second. An ordinary human would have had a pretty good chance to deflect Kate's pistol before she could shoot. A Terminator should have had an even easier time, thanks to superhuman reflexes. They worked great for the Terminator in T2, when it came to relieving the barkeep of his shotgun. Regardless, whether due to poor reflexes of its own, or a lucky twitch from Kate, the T-850 was unable to deflect the pistol without being shot.

Second, where's the bullet hole? Terminator flesh has never been particularly tough, so there should be an injury. While Kate stares in shock, the T-850 retrieves the bullet--from inside its own mouth! The T-850 works its tongue and jaw around until it pushes the bullet to its lips, then spits it out onto the floor. There is no way the bullet could have gone in without causing damage. Even if we assume it pushed its way through the lips, it still should have caused damage. It was moving at about Mach 1. There wouldn't have been time for the flesh to push out of the way without being damaged. And surely the teeth, tongue, and the inside of the T-850's mouth would have been damage. But no, everything is just fine. No bleeding lips, no broken teeth, no hole in the tongue, nothing. Why wasn't the rest of the T-850's flesh so damage resistant?



Even though it had no negative affect at all, the T-850 warns Kate: "Don't do dat". Finally Kate understands that the T-850 really isn't human--a conclusion she could have arrived at hours before if John and the T-850 weren't such idiots. They had plenty of opportunities to prove to Kate what was going on, and they blew all of them. If they had properly explained everything earlier, she might have been more cooperative, and they might have avoided the police encounter that will be happening in mere seconds.

John Connor starts whining about his destiny again. John Connor tells the T-850 to leave him there, that John Connor is not who the T-850 wants, and that it is wasting its time.

Whining again...


The T-850 corrects John, spouting ******** about John Connor leading the Resistance to victory, even though we later learn that in the future the war rages on after John Connor's death. John Connor's not buying it either, demanding to know why he's so significant. He obviously has long lost the natural leadership qualities that John Connor of T2 demonstrated. The T-850 has no good answer, resorting to pointing out the obvious: John Connor is John Connor. The guy we're told is John Connor continues to complain, stating that his mom fed him that ******** from the cradle, and that he's not leadership material. Again, John Connor demonstrates a poor grasp of reality. Three Terminators have come back in time now to kill him. John Connor may not understand his importance, but can't he at least accept that the enemy considers him to be very dangerous? Instead of whining about his situation, maybe he should accept that he's in the middle of some very large events and that in time it will all make sense. Even if he doesn't want to accept that, he should realize that surrender is stupid. A police station full of cops couldn't protect his mom from a Terminator. If John Connor ends up in police custody, the T-X will kill him. The T-X isn't going to care whether or not John Connor refuses to accept his destiny. If anything, his denial will just make him an easier kill. But why should John care about logic when instead he can feel sorry for himself in the middle of a life-or-death situation? And of course, he claims he never was a leader, conveniently forgetting his role in the events of T2. As a child, he repeatedly risked his life to save people. Now, as an adult he can't even be relied upon to protect his own hide. Its like the character evolution works backwards for Stahl's Connor.

The T-850 turns off a quiet two-lane road, and follows a dirt road that descends into a canyon. Wait a minute! Didn't the T-850 just say that they needed a new vehicle? So why has the T-850 picked the most desolate place it could find to search for one? The Hearse sounded terrible. If the vehicle broke down in the middle of nowhere, they'd all be screwed. What if a car didn't come along for hours? What if the first vehicle was a motorcycle or something equally unsuitable for all three of them and their weapons cache? And how many vehicles does the T-850 expect to find out in the wilderness? What, were there no cars in the frickin' city?!

Lucky for the T-850, Ferris & Brancato stuck a conveniently-located RV at a campsite at the end of the dirt road for the T-850 to find. Equally convenient is the fact that the campsite is completely abandoned, even though the people there left the RV unlocked and all sorts of items laying about. The T-850 brings the bullet-riddled Hearse to a stop and attempts to get out. Despite the fact that the only damage to the door consists of a number of bullet holes, the door falls off its hinges in typical cartoon style. Car door hinges are quite beefy, and aren't going to simply fall apart for no reason. The only way that could happen is if this movie was a cartoon. Oh, wait...

the T-850 whips its head to the right, then turns to walk in the direction that its head is pointing. Is it really that hard to just walk away? The T-850 really must be an obsolete design if it can only operate one joint at a time

Finally, the T-850 decides to tell John and Kate about the new Judgement Day. It turns out the first nukes will be launched at 6:18pm, meaning that Judgment Day will be starting in less than three hours. This seems like kind of important information. How could the T-850 think that withholding this sort of information from John and Kate could possibly be a good idea? Plus, if Judgement Day starts in less than three hours, why did the T-850 ensure that it would take them more than three hours to get out of California and into Mexico, not counting inevitable bad traffic or driving a slow vehicle like a large RV? At this rate, it will be the T-850 that's responsible for the deaths of John and Kate, not the T-X. John insists on going to CRS, but the T-850 says that the Mojave area will be heavily irradiated, and that John and Kate won't survive. So why is the T-850 in no hurry to get out of the Mojave desert area? It just keeps placing weapons at the picnic table THAT SHOULD BE GOING DIRECTLY INTO THE RV! QUIT MAKING AN UNNECESSARY PILE OF WEAPONS ON THE TABLE AND PUT ALL THE WEAPONS DIRECTLY INTO THE RV, NOW! How could the T-X possibly fail against a Terminator this stupid?

And when John Connor expresses displeasure at having died in the future, the T-850 reminds him that humans inevitably die, because that's the kind of reassurance people need when they're risking their lives to save the future. It must be more of those quack psychology routines. Can't the T-850 just shut up instead of responding to statements that weren't meant to elicit a response?

Kate is finally aware of the war between humanity and the machines, and asks why the T-850 is on their side. It explains that it was captured and reprogrammed. Despite how annoying the T-850 has been up to this point, and despite realizing that the T-850 has no real vested interest in their lives, Kate feels compelled to thank it for its help. Rather than silently accept the gratitude, the T-850 determines it necessary to point out that it is required to follow Kate's commands, in the process implying that it wouldn't have taken Kate and John to CRS otherwise. This is another shining example of inconsistency. The order that Kate accidentally gave the T-850 was, "Please, please do what he says. You have to save my father." Yet, earlier Kate gave a similarly-worded order to the T-850, "Please, please, please, you have to let me go." So the T-850 only follows orders when it's convenient to the plot.

the T-850 uses an HK UMP to start dumping bullets into "Kate", who is really the T-X. Inexplicably, none of the bullet hits produce the telltale chrome blooms that have repeatedly given away the T-X earlier and later in the movie. Even more inexplicably, getting shot several times forces the T-X to get knocked off its feet. Considering that the T-X previously shrugged off 12 gauge shotgun rounds and a full magazine of 7.62x39 rifle rounds, it's strange that suddenly the T-X is bowled over by a submachinegun firining .45ACP (or smaller) pistol rounds. Our hero, the T-850 has just saved General Brewster's life. Good job!

The real Kate and John Connor run into the room, with Kate yelling at her dad to get away from the T-X. General Brewster decides it's a much better idea to remain confused, while everyone else decides that being in the same room with a leather-clad, machinegun-toting buffoon may be a potentially fatal idea. Meanwhile, the T-X reforms and takes aim at General Brewster. the T-850 is so pleased with itself at having saved General Brewster's life, it forgets that keeping General Brewster alive is an ongoing process. Since Kate didn't order the T-850 to save her father a second time, it just stands there, forcing Kate to resort to screaming at her dad again in a futile effort to save him. John Connor decides to emulate the T-850 and also decides to do nothing to save General Brewster.
Then again, maybe he remembered how ineffective the AK was last time. Still stunned by the stupidity of the script, General Brewster does nothing, allowing the T-X to shoot him several times, but considerately avoids hitting any immediately lethal areas in order to allow him to help the protagonists before dying.

Now that it's too late to save General Brewster, the T-850 decides to return to action, shooting the T-X several times with a grenade launcher. Surprisingly enough, none of the grenades explode at this short range. Ironically, whether by design or by accident, they ended up mimicking real-world behavior of grenades fired at close range, even though this movie seems to pride itself in avoiding realism. The T-X is knocked into a conveniently located vent that is as flimsy as it is gigantic, causing the T-X to be inconvenienced long enough for some character drama.

General Brewster is dying, so naturally the T-850 decides that this would be the perfect time for a mood-breaking unfunny one-liner.

When the T-850 first spots the T-X in the corridor, it stops suddenly, as if startled, instead of smoothly stopping like a machine with nerves literally made of steel. To draw out the drama of the scene, the T-X also stops momentarily, even though its primary targets are right in front of it.

The T-850 proves its lack of situational awareness by attempting to shoot the T-X with an empty gun. And of course, the empty G36 makes a loud click when the T-850 attempts to shoot, never mind that the odds against the T-850 releasing the trigger after firing the last shot but before the hammer attempts to drop on an empty chamber, are astronomical.

Looking for another weapon, the T-850 does another head turn before moving toward the nearest improvised weapon.


The T-850 grabs a pressurized tank that is conveniently on display behind glass. The T-850 then uses the pressurized tank to... hit the T-X across the face?! The T-850 hits the T-X in the FACE (not the head) four times, with the fourth hit producing a gratuitous 360-degree head spin. Why was the T-850 hitting the T-X in the face? In T1, despite being near death, Kyle attacked the T-800 like he meant it, hitting it squarely in the head as if to knock it right off the T-800's shoulders. The T-850 clearly wasn't hitting the T-X squarely in the head, otherwise its head wouldn't not have pivoted the way it did.

After the attack, both Terminators **** their heads gratuitously. The T-850 does so abruptly, seemingly to indicate (more) confusion. In response, the T-X does so as if to say, "Bring it on, *****."

Even though the prior four attacks did nothing to the T-X, the T-850 decides to again try the exact same attack to the head. This time, the T-X punches a hole right into the pressurized tank. Rather than rupture explosively due to the sudden catastrophic hull breach, gas vents out lamely, as if a valve on the tank had been opened to release the gas.

The T-X performs a Rockettes kick, that improbably sends the T-850 flying. The T-850 needs to go on a diet just as much as the T-X does, because when it lands it not only shatters the tile, but the floor beneath the tile.

The T-850 gets up and rushes to the T-X, which stands motionless in wait of a counterattack.



This sets the stage for the entire battle, where in a shameless ripoff of pro-wrestling, each combatant waits for the other to finish its attack before counterattacking. The T-850 grabs the T-X unopposed, and launches it right through a wall, where this battle goes straight to the *******, and not just metaphorically.

During the brief intermission, the T-850 must have decided that it had affections for the T-X, since it hugs the T-X aggressively. It seems that the T-X did not intend to be intimate by touching the T-850's private parts, as it tries to fight off the T-850 by bonking it in the head three times. But then the T-X brings its arms, legs, and head around to return the embrace. Maybe the T-X really does have a crush on the T-850. But then it takes out its flamethrower and starts torching the T-850 in the face. Stop sending mixed messages, woman! Either you like the T-850 or you don't. Even the flamethrower is a mixed message. Is it a literally way of showing that it's hot for the T-850, or is it just dumb enough to think that roasting the side of the T-850's head is going to be of any use whatsoever? The T-850, enjoying this romantic interlude, uses a convenient live power cable to turn the encounter into an electrifying experience. This sends both Terminators into orgasm.

But what's this? The T-X recovers first? Hey, she was faking it! The T-850 is still twitching from the climax of that battle when the T-X walks up. The T-X then stomps on the T-850's head, knocking right off its shoulders. Miraculously, this doesn't break any of the connecting cables, and equally amazing, none of the previous violence managed to unseat the T-850's quick-detach head.

The T-X, doing its best mad scientist impression, gives the T-850 a case of VD--I mean it reprograms the T-850. But then leaves it there inert, with its head still detached. The T-X gets extra villain points for not finishing off its adversary when it's completely helpless to resist--especially when the last time the T-X failed to destroy a helpless T-850, it was able to recover and interfere with its plans.

Kate realizes that John Connor is determined not to shoot at anything in CRS, no matter how much their lives are at stake.It always amazes me that during the mini HK attack all John does is just look with eyes and mouth open and covering his head like scooby doo, yet it was a newcomer to all this nightmare, an unexperienced veterinarian, not a guy who trained all his life and experienced all this before, who actually starts to think and does something and saves their butts. Really, John is more clueless, startled and helpless than a little baby

Now that the T-X is stuck to the particle accelerator, John and Kate run as fast as they can to General Brewster's plane. Actually, no, they don't. They stand there and stare at the T-X as its liquid metal exterior slowly pulls toward the electromagnets. John stares at the T-X for a full ten seconds before declaring that "it's working". Wow, John. Are you really that dense that it takes you ten seconds to figure out that something is sticking to a magnet? And with nuclear war on the way, do you really have time to wait around to see if the villain can figure a way out of it's predicament so it can kill you? Don't forget that at this point, all the time in the world amounts to less than 60 minutes. So get your ass moving, and stop looking for ways to fail!

Kate decides to try to end the movie 20 minutes early by ordering the T-X to "just die, you *****!" The T-X is unable to comply, but unlike the T-850, it does not verbally share this fact with us, proving that the T-X really is more advanced than the obsolete T-850. After standing there for about 20 seconds, John Connor again tells Kate to "come on!", even though John is the one lagging behind.

Meanwhile, the T-850 is just waking up. The T-850 sits up, grabs its poorly rendered head, and just mashes it right back onto its neck. Why would a Terminator need a quick detach head? There's little incentive to make a critical part easier to detach in combat, and one might have expected those sparks and broken wires to be a problem. But no, the T-850 reattaches its head so easily, that even the skin seals back up seamlessly. All the T-850 has do do is work its head around a bit as if it's breaking its own neck--only in reverse

John and Kate make it to the hangar without being folded, spindled, or mutilated. Kate recognizes her father's plane, and out of nowhere we learn that Kate knows how to fly. Most movies have the sense to explain unlikely details like that early in the movie, so that the audience are prepared to accept it when the detail is invoked at a critical moment in the plot. A prime example of that is in T2, where John's hacking abilities are depicted early on at the ATM. By explaining it early on, the audience doesn't treat it as a blatant plot contrivance when he attempts something similar at Cyberdyne. But Ferris & Brancato love blatant plot contrivances, so Kate suddenly knows how to fly at the exact moment the plot requires it.

As the T-850 does the Frankenstein toward John, it answers the question that John didn't ask, explaining that the T-X corrupted its systems.

John finally gets to his feet, but remains way too close to the T-850. It explains that its CPU is intact, but that it cannot control its other functions. Two problems with this. One: Just seconds earlier we saw an error message that said "CPU - Damaged". That doesn't sound like 'intact' to me. Two: Why is every feature on the T-X so half-assed. If the T-X is supposed to be an "anti-Terminator" Terminator, why is it such a failure at that very role? It's weapon is woefully inadequate for destroying a T-850, and now we learn that it did not or cannot reprogram the T-850's CPU? Wouldn't reprogrammng Terminators be the whole point of that stupid nanoinjector? So why is the most important part in a Terminator the one the T-X can't reprogram? This "reprogramming" is so lame as to border on being completely useless

The T-850 pounds the hood next to John Connor's head, while continuing its cringe-worthy internal struggle. Now that his life is in immediate danger, John Connor is willing to invoke the destiny nonsense that he's been whining about the whole movie. "You know my destiny. I have to live." The T-850 displays increasingly erratic and panicky movements, like a cornered animal that's desperate for a way out. Instead of bashing in John Connor's head, the T-850 flings John out of the way and bashes in the vehicle's hood instead. What's that supposed to do? That comes off as an irrational emotional outburst, not a logical way to protect its target. After smashing the heck out of the vehicle, the T-850 bobbles about uncertainly, as if it was dizzy and having trouble maintaining balance.

Finally the T-850 shuts itself down. It's a good thing it didn't do that much sooner, or we would have missed out on all the melodrama.

How did that scene even manage to happen? In both T2 and T3, the Resistance reprogrammed Terminators flawlessly. After reprogramming, any potential Skynet influence was eradicated, and both Terminators were absolutely loyal to the Resistance. So why is it that Skynet can't achieve anywhere near that level of success? The T-X is a machine built by Skynet specifically to reprogram other machines built by Skynet. Yet, when the T-X reprograms the T-850, it is able to resist the effects and eventually overcome them. Shouldn't Skynet understand better than anyone else what it takes to reprogram a Terminator? There is absolutely no reason for the Resistance to be so much better at reprogramming Terminators than Skynet is. If Skynet builds a Terminator that's designed to reprogram other Terminators, it should have a 100% success rate when reprogramming Terminators. But of course, that would ruin the melodramatic moments we just witnessed, so Ferris & Brancato decided to make the nanoinjector as useless as John Connor.

John and Kate climb into the plane and taxi out onto the runway. It hasn't occurred to either of them that the machines could easily take out a slow-moving, unarmed civilian aircraft. As John and Kate attempt to take off, their plane is raked by minigun fire from the T-1's, and patrolling FK thingies launch missiles at the plane, destroying it and killing John and Kate.

Oh, wait. Ferris & Brancato wrote this, so all the machines decide to take a lunch break, allowing John and Kate to take off completely unopposed.

After the helicopter comes to a stop, out pops the T-850. Considering that Kate and John were making their final approach to Crystal Peak when the T-850 rebooted, the T-850 would have had to have broken the sound barrier to arrive at Crystal Peak when it did. Since the helicopter the T-850 arrived in has a similar top speed to the airplane Kate flew and the helicopter the T-X flew, the T-850 should have arrived 15 minutes late. Maybe John had Kate refuel the airplane at an airport outside of Victorville before heading to Crystal Peak.

If the T-850 was trying to rescue John and Kate, why did it choose a method of entry that was virtually guaranteed to kill them? It had no idea where in the hangar they were. For all it knew, crashing like that could have flattened the two of them

The characters don't notice any heat and smoke, but the blast door does, and decides to start closing, triggering alarms in the process. The T-850, demonstrating uncharacteristically quick thinking, runs and dives for the massive blast door in order to keep it open for Kate and John. I has no problems propping the massive blast door open with one elbow. The whole time it's propping open the door, it twitches violently as if it was a human using all its muscle strength, not a machine that it just using its metal arm to prop up the door.

The T-850, using only one hand, manages to break the wrist of the T-X, forcing it to release its grip on John. IF THE T-850 CAN DAMAGE THE T-X THAT EASILY, WHY DIDN'T IT DO SO A LONG TIME AGO?! It could have done that at the animal hospital when the T-X was still pinned under rubble, it could have done that when it managed to get onto the crane, and it could have done that during the CRS pro-wrestling exhibition.



The T-X manages to break free, and attempts to crawl after John and Kate. The T-850 manages to restrain the T-X by grabbing some cables trailing from it. The T-850 clearly has the advantage here. All damage it has sustained is cosmetic, as opposed to the T-X, which is missing both legs and has a broken weapon arm. Clearly the T-850 can overpower the T-X at this point and rip it apart piece by piece. At this point, the T-X has already lost. The T-X is even doing annoying things like screaming, making futile efforts to crawl away without doing anything useful to actually free itself, and even use the liquid metal to reveal how mad it is.

She is the only villain in the series to be directly defeated by the hero. In the other 2 movies, it was ONLY the situation of right time and right place that contributed to success

 

[Khev]

Oh those are just some highlights of everything you felt was wrong with the movie?