Official Transformer Movie Review Thread!!! - Spoiler Free until July 4th!

[Bannister]

sorry but Aliens and Terminator are hardly groundbreaking movies imo. They are pretty damn cheesey as well. But still good enough for a decent ride. comparing this new TF movie to those two, TF would own them any day.

 

[nash]

Okay, I loved the Transformers movie too ... but talking that way about Aliens? Prepare to have all your Geek cred stripped and access to Alba pics "terminated" if such actions continue ....

never had any geek cred anyways. And sorry but Aliens and terminator are both CHEESY ass films. But, i did not say that I dont enjoy them. But to call TF cheesy and say that Aliens and Terminator are classics, is just riddiculous imo.

 

[tomandshell]

Yup, that says it all, P!

Michael Bay can only dream of having all of those accolades on one of his films.

GOLDEN RASPBERRY NOMINATIONS

Worst Picture

ARMAGEDDON (Touchstone), Produced by Jerry Bruckheimer, Gale Anne Hurd and Michael Bay

PEARL HARBOR (Touchstone/Disney)

Worst Actor

Bruce Willis, ARMAGEDDON

Ben Affleck, PEARL HARBOR

Worst Screen "Couple"

Ben Affleck and Liv Tyler, ARMAGEDDON

Ben Affleck & EITHER Kate Beckinsale or Josh Hartnett, PEARL HARBOR

Worst Supporting Actress

Liv Tyler, ARMAGEDDON

Worst Director

Michael Bay, ARMAGEDDON

Michael Bay, PEARL HARBOR

Worst Screenplay

ARMAGEDDON, Screenplay by Jonathan Hensleigh and J.J. Abrams

PEARL HARBOR, Written by Randall Wallace

Worst "Original" Song

"I Don't Want to Miss a Thing" from ARMAGEDDON, Written by Diane Warren

 

[Bannister]

GOLDEN RASPBERRY NOMINATIONS

Worst Picture

ARMAGEDDON (Touchstone), Produced by Jerry Bruckheimer, Gale Anne Hurd and Michael Bay

PEARL HARBOR (Touchstone/Disney)

Worst Actor

Bruce Willis, ARMAGEDDON

Ben Affleck, PEARL HARBOR

Worst Screen "Couple"

Ben Affleck and Liv Tyler, ARMAGEDDON

Ben Affleck & EITHER Kate Beckinsale or Josh Hartnett, PEARL HARBOR

Worst Supporting Actress

Liv Tyler, ARMAGEDDON

Worst Director

Michael Bay, ARMAGEDDON

Michael Bay, PEARL HARBOR

Worst Screenplay

ARMAGEDDON, Screenplay by Jonathan Hensleigh and J.J. Abrams

PEARL HARBOR, Written by Randall Wallace

Worst "Original" Song

"I Don't Want to Miss a Thing" from ARMAGEDDON, Written by Diane Warren

Yeah, but did those films actually win?

 

[nash]

Yup, that says it all, P!

Michael Bay can only dream of having all of those accolades on one of his films.

Michael bay makes some of the best films around.

 

[nash]

wtf is a golden raspberry nomination? If you actually care or know what that is, you need to step away from your computer

 

[dekadentdave]

wtf is a golden raspberry nomination? If you actually care or know what that is, you need to step away from your computer

Maybe you should step away from your computer and enlighten yourself to the reality of just how bad a filmaker Michael Bay really is.

TRANSFORMERS WRAP POEM
The film is a wrap?
Wow, how about that!
It's still loads of crap.
And the Stooges swallow this pap?
[Producer Don] Murphy and [producer Tom] Desanto lead the cheerleader charge
While Skorponok takes credit by and large.
The fact is today
There is nothing okay
The content of the film's not fit for a barge.
​

Let your sugary friend answer the clamor All you sweet kiddles want in on the drama?
The trouble beginning to end Is named A-D-A-M
Goodman [DreamWorks president of production] New studio head [Stacey] Snider
Decided him to fire
But then in a Hail Mary pass
Goodman kissed the right piece of ass
"Do not fire me, no do not please"
The chubby young Goodman said on his knees
I can do something you don't want to do
I can control Michael Bay just for you.
New studio head Snider
Knew he's a liar
But decided to stay out of the mess
"Sure Mr. Chubwon, you control Bay-san
And keep this boy's movie **** off my dress"
Then dumb Mr. Goodman
As only a dunce can
Proceeded to hide in the sand
For the first time in history
It was a complete mystery
How one director had ALL of the power!!!!!!
The film is what it is and that's all that it is
Most trufans will want to take a long whiz
And though valiant and Brave Tom Ian and Don slaved
Fact is Goodman gave the keys to the Kingdom to Bayed.
If you hate the dumb story
And realize the characters are a worry
And wonder how Bay could screwup so bad
Remember the missive that Sugarboy brought you
It wasn't just Michael but Goodman too!
​

 

[tomandshell]

The Razzies are just kind of a joke, honoring what they think are the worst films made each year. And no, I don't think any of those I listed actually won--they were just nominations.

I don't go into a Michael Bay movie expecting anything but a fun summer popcorn movie, and he always delivers that. He is actually one of the more consistent filmmakers out there, for better or worse. If you know what to expect--and enjoy that sort of thing--you will rarely be let down when you go to see one of his flicks. He is really one of the best around when it comes to shooting speed and action. If anything, his films work best when he allows the editor to get to work and keep things moving along. He excels at chases and fights and explosions and pedestrian humor, not acting and plot.

Also, The Rock received an Oscar nomination for Sound; Armageddon for Sound, Sound Effects Editing, Visual Effects and Original Song; and Pearl Harbor won for Sound Editing and was also nominated for Visual Effects, Original Song and Sound. So his films have received Academy Award recognition. But he makes his movies for the audience, not the critics.

 

[DouglasMcc]

Maybe you should step away from your computer and enlighten yourself to the reality of just how bad a filmaker Michael Bay really is. Transformers Wrap Poem deleted because ... well, does anyone really want to look at those idle ramblings a second time?

No Dave, tell us how you really feel ... If I hear on the news about Bay being assassinated by a skinny guy wearing an Optimus Prime helmet, I am going to have to turn you in sir ...

But seriously, how can you call Bay a bad filmmaker ... it's actually an insult to all the truly horrible directors/filmmakers out there:

Uwe Boll
Roger Christian (Battfield Earth - never noticed it before ... rather ironic name for a Scientology funded film )
Paul W.S. Anderson
Ed Wood
Jess Franco
Russ Myer
Alan Smithee (yeah, I know the joke, but it's my way of calling out producers who don't know when to just sit back and STFU).

Seriously, calling Bay a mediocre filmmaker ... I wouldn't agree, but I would respect your opinion ... is one thing. But, he's no where near the horrible director you make him out to be. Plus, other than The Island, his movies are rated rather well on IMDB and all made serious money for their studios. And that's not even counting the 300+ million Transformers will net BEFORE DVD.

Sigh, I feel bad for you Dave. Bay kinda feel out of favor after The Island bombed. However, Transformers is going to push him into Superstar status again (lol, rumors are he already signed a contract for Transformers 2). So, it looks like you will have plenty of films to needless rant about over the next few years ... :chew

 

[dekadentdave]

Douglas likes to argue for the sake of arguing. FYI buddy I didn't write that poem, it was written by someone very high up on the production of the film who worked closely with Bay and posted it at the movie wrap party to express his disatisfaction with Bay's so-called "vision."

 

[BDboystoys]

Aliens and Terminator cheesy? I think not

Transformers is definitely Bay's best film in my opinion, and is a credit to his ability to create highly entertaining films. Transformers had cheese in it, but it just felt right and suited it perfectly adding to the experience. Strangely, it was apart of the appeal for me(aside from the fact it harnessed and mastered the blockbuster genre in every way) And in normal circumstance I cringe at cheesy dialogue.

 

[figuremasterles]

Why does every movie viewing have to be considered under the same, comparable circumstances? To me, movies are just like food. You just enjoy certain ones, for certain reasons, and when you feel like it. No manner of justifying can resolve anything regarding one's tastes.

It's all just snackfood anyway. Movies. Not many are really that important.
Aliens, Terminator, Die Hard, Star Wars...Transformers. All actioners. Mostly. Snack food. High in sugar content. Gives you a rush. Some have messages, some don't. So what.

Takes all kinds I guess.
Variety is the spice of life indeed! Be boring in here if we all liked the same stuff. I love the goading.
This is some funny stuff to read. Comparing Aliens to Transformers.
No way to compare this stuff. It's all fluff!

 

[Bannister]

Why does every movie viewing have to be considered under the same, comparable circumstances? To me, movies are just like food. You just enjoy certain ones, for certain reasons, and when you feel like it. No manner of justifying can resolve anything regarding one's tastes.

It's all just snackfood anyway. Movies. Not many are really that important.
Aliens, Terminator, Die Hard, Star Wars...Transformers. All actioners. Mostly. Snack food. High in sugar content. Gives you a rush. Some have messages, some don't. So what.

Takes all kinds I guess.
Variety is the spice of life indeed! Be boring in here if we all liked the same stuff. I love the goading.
This is some funny stuff to read. Comparing Aliens to Transformers.
No way to compare this stuff. It's all fluff!

 

[BDboystoys]

Why does every movie viewing have to be considered under the same, comparable circumstances? To me, movies are just like food. You just enjoy certain ones, for certain reasons, and when you feel like it. No manner of justifying can resolve anything regarding one's tastes.

It's all just snackfood anyway. Movies. Not many are really that important.
Aliens, Terminator, Die Hard, Star Wars...Transformers. All actioners. Mostly. Snack food. High in sugar content. Gives you a rush. Some have messages, some don't. So what.

Takes all kinds I guess.
Variety is the spice of life indeed! Be boring in here if we all liked the same stuff. I love the goading.
This is some funny stuff to read. Comparing Aliens to Transformers.
No way to compare this stuff. It's all fluff!

You sir, are a scholar

 

[MaulFan]

Why does every movie viewing have to be considered under the same, comparable circumstances? To me, movies are just like food. You just enjoy certain ones, for certain reasons, and when you feel like it. No manner of justifying can resolve anything regarding one's tastes.

It's all just snackfood anyway. Movies. Not many are really that important.
Aliens, Terminator, Die Hard, Star Wars...Transformers. All actioners. Mostly. Snack food. High in sugar content. Gives you a rush. Some have messages, some don't. So what.

Takes all kinds I guess.
Variety is the spice of life indeed! Be boring in here if we all liked the same stuff. I love the goading.
This is some funny stuff to read. Comparing Aliens to Transformers.
No way to compare this stuff. It's all fluff!

Once again, Les is the man!!! Very well put Les, you should be like the ruler of the Freaks Board, the wisest of the wise, you're like our Yoda or Gandalf

 

[Chrakalackis]

Once again, Les is the man!!! Very well put Les, you should be like the ruler of the Freaks Board, the wisest of the wise, you're like our Yoda or Gandalf

I was thinkin the same thing Yoda that is...I second that, very well put indeed, Les gandalf). I may try and talk my sweet wife into seeing it again tomorrow night. Nuthin like a romantic evening with Prime and friends.

 

[Dusty]

I can believe in giant transforming robots but I don't believe these broads have a brain.

Rather than take offense at this, I am simply going to point out that there are a lot of "broads" with brains, and many of them are quite beautiful. BUT the difference is that they don't have makeup artists, hair stylists, wardrobe designers, and personal trainers working with them daily to create the perfect look. If they did have all of that, I think you'd be surprised

And BTW, that's a GOOD thing... can you imagine how horribly male productivity would drop if all of their female co-workers came to work looking like supermodels everday?

 

[Super Poseable]

For a summer popcorn movie, I give this a 7 out of 10, bordering on 6. The movie operated on its own aesthetics, logic and continuity away from the cartoon and I'm fine with that. Apart from dodgy editing (what happened to the microwave oven transformer?) I was entertained.

My main complaint is that Megatron's presence and reason for existence is sorely lacking. If Megatron is baddest of bad, I wanted to see the others cower before him, or have Megatron actually smack Starscream in the head as he cursed him for not getting the All Spark yet. And despite all the apparent energy generated in the All Spark, Megatron simply fizzled out. LAME! His armor plates should have exploded out like a frag grenade.

My two cents.

 

[IrishJedi]

Rather than take offense at this, I am simply going to point out that there are a lot of "broads" with brains, and many of them are quite beautiful. BUT the difference is that they don't have makeup artists, hair stylists, wardrobe designers, and personal trainers working with them daily to create the perfect look. If they did have all of that, I think you'd be surprised

 

[MaulFan]

Rather than take offense at this, I am simply going to point out that there are a lot of "broads" with brains, and many of them are quite beautiful. BUT the difference is that they don't have makeup artists, hair stylists, wardrobe designers, and personal trainers working with them daily to create the perfect look. If they did have all of that, I think you'd be surprised

And BTW, that's a GOOD thing... can you imagine how horribly male productivity would drop if all of their female co-workers came to work looking like supermodels everday?