Darth Cruel
Super Freak
Paris Hilton hasn't done that many guys
January 9, 2009
Because no sane person ever will, Paris Hilton is defending her own honor in the pages of Glamour where she claims to have slept with only a few guys and isn't a walking stick of promiscuity:
Okay, here's the part of the post where I equate Paris Hilton's vagina with a petri dish, but instead, I'm going to open myself up a bit and share a little experience I just had. This is a 100% true story. Alright, deep breath, here goes: Last night, I had a dream about Paris Hilton.
In this dream I'm carrying Paris through at least five feet snow up to this cliff. As we're talking it turns out we were married at one point then quickly divorced, but now we're off to a condo on the beach to "rekindle our love," if you will. So, I'm carrying Paris and wading through all this snow to get to the top of the cliff which overlooks the ocean. There we'll jump off then swim to our destination. Except the snow starts getting really high and I lose my footing, trip and start getting buried in the snow. That's when I wake up.
I don't know if any of you guys are dream experts, but I have a tumor, don't I? Awesome.
So she is trying to pitch the angle that she is damn near virginal now???
Corrected. No need to thank me.
