DarkArtist's End of the Line Thread

[thenammagazine]

Re: DarkArtist's Creations of DOOM!

If you have no "dog in this fight", then why come in here and say anything at all? Like I said before, you don't know me well enough to accuse me of using people, or of "sweet talking" them into doing anything. I'm not that kind of person. Being ex military, I know the core values... honor, courage, and commitment. I live by those values, and even though I let people down... I still am here trying to make it right.

I know my business model sucks, but that is why I abandoned it and am no longer taking orders. I don't know what else I can do.

Again, I'm not sweet talking anyone. I've offered refunds, I've offered everything I have...

I don't have a Myers figure, Part VIII Jason, Ash, or Roy on my shelf... because people are still waiting on theirs. My Indy PF has no head, because people are still waiting on theirs. Anything that someone is waiting on, I don't have one done for myself. So tell me again how selfish I am... go ahead. Tell me I don't care. Tell me I am a golden boy who pours honey into the ears of my followers. Call me whatever you want. I do what I can, I am honest about my situation. If that isn't enough for you, take your negativity somewhere else.

I didn't commission a Jason VIII from you because of your business model, I did it because of your reputation and shots of the final product. I think if most others look at why they initially commissioned pieces from you, in their hearts, they'll agree it was for the same reasons. I truly think some of the other douchy customizers have lit the fire of impatience and intolerance in others and that is the reason for the haterade posting. It's not fair and in most cases unwarranted (there are others who've been waiting a lot longer than most of the "I WANT IT NOW!!!" people, others who know and expect that good things come to those who wait). In the end, I have no doubt that you'll come through, and actually prefer you taking as long as you need. The end results will be best for everybody. Not only that, but the negativity has ruined it for others who've yet to come here or commission a piece, in sharing these special customs. It's a shame that others just can't see this.

 

[carbo-fation]

Re: DarkArtist's Creations of DOOM!

Good luck Josh! I believe in you. Take care of yourself and don't let people bring you down.

 

[abstractharmony]

Re: DarkArtist's Creations of DOOM!

Hey Josh,

Don't even worry about repainting the Carnell head for the Leggy. Just plunk the factory head back on and bundle him and Frodo up.

Ship 'em when you can.

Hope you and T are as well as can be expected.

 

[Dront]

Re: DarkArtist's Creations of DOOM!

Dront, Sined... guys... I will get your stuff done. It's close. I'll post pics if you want. I can only do what I can when I can, I can't give a timetable because I don't honestly know when it will be done. I have several weeks off, so there is a good chance that it will be done by early January.

And again, i am sorry for the wait.

I wish you luck Josh and Merry Christmas.
Sorry for strong words.

 

[Eli26]

Re: DarkArtist's Creations of DOOM!

I can't believe how this thread has lurched into a pit. Seriously, am i the only person concerned with the fact DA has mentioned mental breakdown and thoughts of suicide more than once? And here we have Sined and Dront aka Dr Evil an Mini Me harping on about where their toys are. Seriously UNBELIEVABLE.

I understand where they are coming from, but yes, I didn't know that Josh was talking like that... he has a wife.. and shouldn't even be talking about suicide. He needs to be strong. You certain about that?

I still think highly of Josh and am more upset about hearing about that then the fact I have an outstanding order with him. Granted I have all the confidence in the world I'll get my stuff.

That pisses me off. Suicide is selfish and only ends up hurting those around the person they love. I don't think Josh would ever do that anyway. He's too strong of a person in that aspect of his life. So I don't believe it. But I do believe he's going through crap and wish that he can get over it. But people have to understand why the pitchforks have come out, and nobody better understands that than Josh and he's doing the best that he can to fix it. I guess that's all we can ask of him right now. But yes, I don't see a problem with guys wanting picture updates. That isn't asking for much imo.

Josh is a champ. He's has a beautiful wife and home, good friends, been seeing great results from the gym, and has a skillset and talent that many don't have, so he has a lot to be fortunate about as well.

STFU Bodie!

 

[Les Walker]

Re: DarkArtist's Creations of DOOM!

Josh Church is my friend.

I love him and his wife almost as much as my own family.
We have LITERALLY shared brews and tears together, sat in lawn chairs til 2am sharing tales of our youths, both good and bad, and let me tell ya, Josh has me beat in the bad department, so I feel especially defensive for him in that area...but still...

He and I both have shared dark days. And we have supported each other. He has backed me up, here, as a mod, when others attacked me. I therefore have to step up and be his supporter in return. Brothers back to back.

Not to provoke anger in those that anguish at his (and of course, my own seperate and unrelated) delayed timetable, but to reaffirm to those folks, and anyone else that may ever have future dealings with him, that he is indeed, a kind and well intended soul. He does mean well. And has tried.
I must say this, as his friend. As someone who actually knows him in person.

But...
I see and know both sides.
I even have learned to put customer's sides ahead of my own. THAT is hard to do. Even now.
Josh is not taking this very well, just as those that are angered, and impatient are not also. Josh and I both have had similar tides in that we both made bad choices, under less than ideal conditions, and without good and more experienced advice, and are living with those choices now (and trying to resolve them for all time), seeing our previous (overly hyped and yes, perhaps too-positively reinforced) images brought down before us, by our own actions. And let me tell ya, nothing sucks more than that.

I can see how it's affected Josh in deep personal ways, and brought up bad feelings of old memories from his past, memories he doesn't need to share here, and that is the shame of it. On the one hand, I think he should change his postings a bit, the "World's Worst Customizer" stuff should go. You are not. Do not give in to that kind of dispair my friend.

Josh, all it is, is simply that you are accountable, as am I to my folks. Anyone else that can simply understand, and help, and be as patient as is reasonably possible, so that the work can get finished, will only help to get this over with and behind him. Not much more I can say there.

What Josh does with his life after this is anyone's guess. I know this much, he will always be my friend. Always. We have gone through this wild couple of years together, for very seperate reasons, with, ironically similar outcomes, but together, we both know EXACTLY what it feels like for the other. The painful days and the slow work, and the feeling that it might never get done. But, I am grateful that you were there to share with.

But, buddy, we gotta get up, dust off, and finish! You must!
You can! You will. I know you will.
They need to know you will also.
Rise up and remember, and be the Dark Artist once more.


You know you are loved. Believe that or not, but you are.

Thanks for being there for me when I needed you most. I can never pay all of that back, but I can always be here for you. Always.

Now, let's get this work done and out and get this thread back on track!!!!!


Your friend always,
Les

 

[Eli26]

Re: DarkArtist's Creations of DOOM!

Josh Church is my friend.

I love him and his wife almost as much as my own family.
We have LITERALLY shared brews and tears together, sat in lawn chairs til 2am sharing tales of our youths, both good and bad, and let me tell ya, Josh has me beat in the bad department, so I feel especially defensive for him in that area...but still...

He and I both have shared dark days. And we have supported each other. He has backed me up, here, as a mod, when others attacked me. I therefore have to step up and be his supporter in return. Brothers back to back.

Not to provoke anger in those that anguish at his (and of course, my own seperate and unrelated) delayed timetable, but to reaffirm to those folks, and anyone else that may ever have future dealings with him, that he is indeed, a kind and well intended soul. He does mean well. And has tried.
I must say this, as his friend. As someone who actually knows him in person.

But...
I see and know both sides.
I even have learned to put customer's sides ahead of my own. THAT is hard to do. Even now.
Josh is not taking this very well, just as those that are angered, and impatient are not also. Josh and I both have had similar tides in that we both made bad choices, under less than ideal conditions, and without good and more experienced advice, and are living with those choices now (and trying to resolve them for all time), seeing our previous (overly hyped and yes, perhaps too-positively reinforced) images brought down before us, by our own actions. And let me tell ya, nothing sucks more than that.

I can see how it's affected Josh in deep personal ways, and brought up bad feelings of old memories from his past, memories he doesn't need to share here, and that is the shame of it. On the one hand, I think he should change his postings a bit, the "World's Worst Customizer" stuff should go. You are not. Do not give in to that kind of dispair my friend.

Josh, all it is, is simply that you are accountable, as am I to my folks. Anyone else that can simply understand, and help, and be as patient as is reasonably possible, so that the work can get finished, will only help to get this over with and behind him. Not much more I can say there.

What Josh does with his life after this is anyone's guess. I know this much, he will always be my friend. Always. We have gone through this wild couple of years together, for very seperate reasons, with, ironically similar outcomes, but together, we both know EXACTLY what it feels like for the other. The painful days and the slow work, and the feeling that it might never get done. But, I am grateful that you were there to share with.

But, buddy, we gotta get up, dust off, and finish! You must!
You can! You will. I know you will.
They need to know you will also.
Rise up and remember, and be the Dark Artist once more.


You know you are loved. Believe that or not, but you are.

Thanks for being there for me when I needed you most. I can never pay all of that back, but I can always be here for you. Always.

Now, let's get this work done and out and get this thread back on track!!!!!


Your friend always,
Les

Someone sign this guy to a movie deal.

But great motivation Les! You rule!

 

[MANDO]

Re: DarkArtist's Creations of DOOM!

A testimonial from the Figuremaster is like money in bank.

Personally I think it's highly respectable that DA still posts in this thread, especially as crazy as it has become. There's at least a handful of other customizers who've dropped off that you'd be lucky to even get that from.

 

[Eli26]

Re: DarkArtist's Creations of DOOM!

A testimonial from the Figuremaster is like money in bank.

Personally I think it's highly respectable that DA still posts in this thread, especially as crazy as it has become. There's at least a handful of other customizers who've dropped off that you'd be lucky to even get that from.

Very true. No, I give credit to Josh for that. It isn't easy doing what he does.

 

[DarkArtist81]

Re: DarkArtist's Creations of DOOM!

Outstanding post Les, thank you from the bottom of my heart for that. I need it now more than ever. You know more than anyone what Hell I have endured in my life, and that I've been a bit too close to dark thoughts and events... So you saying those words does indeed bring a tear to my eye.

Last night was hard for me. I broke down to my Wife, and she was having a hard day too... so she reacted in a way that sparked a very heated argument between the both of us. Things escalated, I kicked a table across the room and came close to accidentally hurting her... something I would have regretted greatly. Luckily, it calmed down... and ended the only way it could. With me in tears, confessing to her the pressure I have been under and the darker thoughts I have dealt with.

In the end, we are both ok... maybe even stronger for it. But it illustrated the price of what this whole situation has done to me. My life has changed beyond belief in the time since I was actively taking orders. And the pressure from the lateness and lack of drive has been building up like a volcano waiting to erupt. Yesterday was the tipping point, and I ???? you guys not... I was very close to attempting to take my own life. If my Wife would have walked out on me, I just might have tried again.

I don't blame anyone, least of all any customers I have wronged. This is my mess, and I am the only person who can claw my way out of it. My heart isn't in this work any more, but that doesn't mean I should short my customers for the stuff they paid me to do. And I will continue to do whatever I can to wring out whatever I have left in the art dept to do just that.

And Les, you are my best friend man... know that. You've been amazing during this time I have known you, and I owe you a lot. I hate that we both went through this, but at least we gained a friendship out of it... one that will last for a looong time.

As far as my art, I will always do figures for myself. But I know for a fact that I am closing up shop for good once I am done. I don't want to do this any more. I'm going to focus on my family, school, and I hope to write and do canvas work. And this thread will be closed down immediately once I send off the last item to whoever... Someone else can be the golden boy... But I warn whoever does end up with that status, it comes with a price. All things must come to an end, and they usually end badly.

As for my very negative sig and avatar, I'm keeping them. They remind me of how bad I screwed up, my own personal scarlet letter for all to see. I deserve it. I won't deny that. Just know, my friends... that I am struggling to remain positive and will hopefully have something to share soon to show that.

Thanks for everything guys, and again... I sincerely apologize to anyone affected by this mess. You guys deserve better than that.

 

[tnaig001]

Re: DarkArtist's Creations of DOOM!

Hey Josh. My offer still stands. I didn't pm you cos I figured you prob dun want to go in there.

Just pm me your paypal addy and it'll be done. I may not know you personally but you don't deserve to go thru this alone.


James.

 

[DarkArtist81]

Re: DarkArtist's Creations of DOOM!

You are a stand up guy James, thank you for your generosity and for extended a hand like that... It's amazing of you, quite honestly.

I can't take it though, I wouldn't feel right to do so... But the offer means a lot to me. You rock man, the support is worth two times any monetary amount right now.

 

[tnaig001]

Re: DarkArtist's Creations of DOOM!

Well so that you know the offer is always there. Just drop me a note whenever if ever you need it.

Hang in there bud. It sounds cliched but the sun will rise eventually.


James.

 

[Reinhardt]

Re: DarkArtist's Creations of DOOM!

Very heartfelt post Josh. There is nothing more that I can add, but know that you are in my thoughts.

 

[Kabukiman]

Re: DarkArtist's Creations of DOOM!

Josh -

You are literally one day older than I am. So, while you do have one more day of learning and wisdom on me, I can tell you that from where I sit, getting this upset over toys is about as stupid as stupid gets.

Look at it logically, you offered people either their stuff back, or the promise that they will eventually get their custom completed at some point. There is nothing more you can do. If people are going to continue to ????? after that offer, then ?????ing is just something they probably get off on. So getting upset over people ?????ing at this point as if it is your fault is (as Spock would say) illogical.

In other words: ???? 'EM! ???? 'EM ALL!

You're one day older than I am and I can tell you that there is far too great a future for both of us to get too upset about some painted pieces of plastic and polystone.

 

[nash]

Re: DarkArtist's Creations of DOOM!

this thread is pretty nuts

 

[Eli26]

Re: DarkArtist's Creations of DOOM!

this thread is pretty nuts

It is nuts, because it's full of nutty people and it looks like one more nut joined up! What's up bro?

 

[Eli26]

Re: DarkArtist's Creations of DOOM!

Outstanding post Les, thank you from the bottom of my heart for that. I need it now more than ever. You know more than anyone what Hell I have endured in my life, and that I've been a bit too close to dark thoughts and events... So you saying those words does indeed bring a tear to my eye.

Last night was hard for me. I broke down to my Wife, and she was having a hard day too... so she reacted in a way that sparked a very heated argument between the both of us. Things escalated, I kicked a table across the room and came close to accidentally hurting her... something I would have regretted greatly. Luckily, it calmed down... and ended the only way it could. With me in tears, confessing to her the pressure I have been under and the darker thoughts I have dealt with.



In the end, we are both ok... maybe even stronger for it. But it illustrated the price of what this whole situation has done to me. My life has changed beyond belief in the time since I was actively taking orders. And the pressure from the lateness and lack of drive has been building up like a volcano waiting to erupt. Yesterday was the tipping point, and I ???? you guys not... I was very close to attempting to take my own life. If my Wife would have walked out on me, I just might have tried again.

I don't blame anyone, least of all any customers I have wronged. This is my mess, and I am the only person who can claw my way out of it. My heart isn't in this work any more, but that doesn't mean I should short my customers for the stuff they paid me to do. And I will continue to do whatever I can to wring out whatever I have left in the art dept to do just that.

And Les, you are my best friend man... know that. You've been amazing during this time I have known you, and I owe you a lot. I hate that we both went through this, but at least we gained a friendship out of it... one that will last for a looong time.

As far as my art, I will always do figures for myself. But I know for a fact that I am closing up shop for good once I am done. I don't want to do this any more. I'm going to focus on my family, school, and I hope to write and do canvas work. And this thread will be closed down immediately once I send off the last item to whoever... Someone else can be the golden boy... But I warn whoever does end up with that status, it comes with a price. All things must come to an end, and they usually end badly.

As for my very negative sig and avatar, I'm keeping them. They remind me of how bad I screwed up, my own personal scarlet letter for all to see. I deserve it. I won't deny that. Just know, my friends... that I am struggling to remain positive and will hopefully have something to share soon to show that.

Thanks for everything guys, and again... I sincerely apologize to anyone affected by this mess. You guys deserve better than that.

Take off the failure in your avatar. You're not a failure Josh. You suck at making your times, but so do I. You're not a failure though. I am being honest when I say this. You suck at making deadlines, but you seem like a super caring person, and that doesn't make you a failure, it just makes you... bad at timing. lol That and you're stressed. Welcome to the world, we all get stressed. I get so stressed I nearly get myself removed from places because I forget that just because I had a ???? day doesn't entitle me to crap on others. Man, I hate having to go back and say sorry for causing an act of stupidity.

I really don't like your avatar. Please change it to "I am capable" because that will make you work a lot more than this feeling sorry for yourself... you are adding more stress to yourself than you deserve.

I complain about my stuff, but so what. Let me... lol I can. But I like you so I don't want you being down on yourself like this. This won't make you productive, and if you were a failure... how do you have friends, a wife that loves you, and the fact you're getting in awesome shape? I don't know, but it seems like time management became an issue. That doesn't make you a failure. Please change your avatar and your sig. Nobody wants to read that!

P.S. Even I have broken down and done things I am not proud of, but you don't seem like a loser or failure. You're a winner going through a ????ty time in your life. Take a week off from the work. Get yourself in a good place.. I wouldn't work on the stuff right now with the stress you're enduring. Sorry if I made you feel bad too. I feel for you... man we are so similar with the way we handle stress.

 

[RichAlot]

Re: DarkArtist's Creations of DOOM!

Josh-

I had a feeling you were in over your head and that's why I asked you to just send my items back. It was frustrating for me to be told my items would be done in 2-3 months and see people like Kuato and Small Studios knock out these great works while all the time I can't even get a response from you about the status of my items. What frustrated me even more was that I couldn't even get a response after I just asked for my items back b/c I thought it would help take some of the burden off of you.

I think there are a lot of people who are willing to wait it out, but you're not communicating and that's why everyone is frustrated. I'm sure if you created a list of what you're working on and checked things off as you went along it would do 2 things; put faith in the fact that you'll get things done and get people off your back. Sure there will be those people who want their items in the time you promised, but they'll cut you some slack if you show them you're working. I'm also sure those people who aren't in a rush to get their things back will let you put their stuff on the backburner to get the "rush" jobs done. You can save yourself a lot of headaches by coming clean and compiling a list that everyone can follow.

As far as your lack of motivation and suicidal thoughts; you're depressed. One of the telltale signs of depression is a lack of interest in things that make (made) you happy. Though you're not happy with this hobby now b/c of the bad choices you made, you still say you want to continue doing your own things. That light at the end of the tunnel tells me there is hope and you've got to overcome the depression hurdle.

Another sign of depression is hiding and avoiding your problem as a solution to helping you put it in the back of your mind for a bit. The problem with that is that it can help you diffuse this situation for a bit, but when you come back to the forums the problem is still here and it makes you even more miserable b/c it's overwhelming.

I strongly recommend you try to talk to someone about it. You'll feel better. If you're a student, your university should have counselors at your disposal for free. Use them, it's what they're there for and they'll help you. Maybe you need meds, maybe you just need to talk, maybe you just need a game plan. Either way, there are professionals out there to help you get past this.

You've admitted your mistakes and I'm sure many people will forgive you, but you can just talk the talk, you have to walk the walk. Man up and put together a list of what you've got to finish. If you didn't do a good job of keeping a list and you don't know what you need to get done or you're embarrassed to let everyone know how far behind you are, you shouldn't be. I'm sure everyone will be happy that you're giving them what they want. At this point being honest will make you feel better and it may even get you thinking straight. There's not reason to think about killing yourself--sure people have money invested in this, but it's toys we're talking about. See a counselor, put a list together so everyone can see it and start knocking this ???? out. Don't let this stuff beat you down and take advantage of the help around you, but at the same time make the commitment to yourself to get yourself out of this rut. Think about the light at the end of the tunnel and how good it will feel to be done with it all.

 

[SilentSurfer]

Re: DarkArtist's Creations of DOOM!

Hey Josh,

Haven't visited this thread in a while, and I actually came here for a little inspiration cause I like seeing what you are up to. I guess I've missed a bit of drama. Don't let it get you down, brother. Maybe this was all just a hard way to learn how to gage what you are capable of handling all at one time. I often find myself with so much work to do that it gets overwhelming, but I think I'd be even more upset if nobody cared to have my work anymore. I'm looking at over 200 pages full of great stuff in this thread. You clearly love what you do, but even hobbies become jobs.

I don't want to see you quit or give up. Think of it like an Indian making a canoe. Just chip away little by little. Eventually you're floating down the stream again.

And I agree with the other guys here that care about you. Take that friggin' avatar down and change your signature. It's clear you've gotten depressed and self defeating, but you need to change that right now. Treat this like rock bottom. You have nowhere to do but up from here.

God bless you and have a Merry Christmas. I damn well better be seeing some more custom work filling these pages soon and no more beating yourself.

Save that for the shower...