I have seem this figure in hand and I tell you, you are right on both accounts and that is both sides are hyperboles. Now this might seem like a paradox, but let me explain.
The figure is very realistic in fact when I saw it in hand it looks like a real person wearing make up. As for the Ledger likeness it does look like Ledger and it doesn't. It all depends on the angles, if you have the head facing straight or slightly looking up it nearly screams Ledger, this accounts for why people think it is the best thing ever!
However, if you have the head tilted down it can make a tremendous difference to the likeness of Ledger. That is because the eyes are really deep set like a caveman and the brow bone covers them when the head is tilted down. Also the long nose and long chin look more noticeable. This is the reason why the likeness looks so poor sometimes, and hence why people think it looks deformed.
I do not own this figure and can not show any pictures for why it looks so different. This is what I have noticed when I saw it in hand at my LCS.
You are right you have to see it in hand to make a decision, I didn't buy it because on some angles it looked amazing and on some angles it looked bad. It is not a figure with consistently, it is like a chameleon.
Will your LCS be getting any in so you can see what it looks like in hand?
That being said I do not think it is a bad figure, and may one day still buy it if the Joker 2.0 turns out to be bad. I am not trying to tell anyone what they should and should not buy, I am just saying this is a figure you have to see in hand to make a choice IMO.