My understanding is that Leia formed the Resistance without official sponsorship or endorsement from the New Republic. Part of her intent was to take on the FO preemptively in order to keep them from gaining control. Wouldn't that mean she'd have no backing from Republic fleets to support her pro-active missions in a campaign against the FO?
I didn't get that impression from TFA. From the opening scroll: "With the support of the REPUBLIC, General Leia Organa leads a brave RESISTANCE." After the Hosnian system is destroyed C-3PO exclaims "without the Republic fleet we are doomed!" So the film itself definitely led us to believe that the Republic was backing Leia (or at least a good portion of it if you go by the side novels that came out around the time that TFA was released.)
If that's the case, then Han's potential value (even as an ace pilot like Poe) to Leia's tiny group would be even more magnified than his value had been to the larger Alliance/Rebellion. Even Maz told Han that he was the one who needed to deliver BB-8; because he should go back home and get in "the fight." And the whole reason Leia was dedicating resources to finding Luke is that she needed help. Han apparently just chose not to help. He wasn't just absent as far as protecting Leia, but absent as far as protecting a peace they'd all struggled so much to secure.
Possibly, but I think that for me Han is a character who is allowed to be "emotionally compromised" to the point where it temporarily takes him out of the fight yet is still forgivable. Taking orders from his ex in a military campaign against his own son sounds pretty far beyond what I would expect his character to be able to handle. Even the mighty Aragorn took himself out of the fight for however many years due to his own emotional angst. To me those are flaws that add depth to their characters but don't ruin them.
First of all, I gotta know: is your distaste for Poe in danger of approaching Rose levels? Ya keep knockin' the poor guy.
I think my distaste is more in how he was written in TLJ as opposed to simply not liking his character. Kind of like Han, Fett, and to a lesser extent Vader in ROTJ; all three of them were written in ways that really diminished how cool they were but I still like them. So Poe can still recover if Episode IX redeems him because I really liked him in TFA.
As far as Han, you're absolutely right that everything Han did with respect to Starkiller was heroic. And that even includes his decision to confront his son face to face. But every time I get close to being content with Han's ending, I ultimately can't get around the fact that one of the most iconic characters in cinema history was taken out with abject sadness as his final emotion - instead of with at least some token note of final heroic purpose and satisfaction. Which leads to . . .
I agree about the formality of pressing the button, but that mere symbolic gesture alone would have changed our view of Han's final thoughts and feelings. Instead of dying with nothing but devastated sadness, the mere act of pressing that button as he fell would have conveyed a sense of resolve - and a feeling for more than just the overwhelming negative. It would have told us, "yeah Han is devastated as he dies, but pressing that button means that it wasn't all-consuming for him . . . Han still had a mindset that allowed for wanting to accomplish something good."
Either way, what's done is done. TFA was still a much-needed return to fun SW cinema with competent acting, writing, dialogue, and cinematography. It was a great SW palate-cleanser for me, and much appreciated for being that. My wish for a different ending for Han doesn't take away from the positive aspects of TFA. It's purely a subjective thing, not anything along the lines of objective criticism.
I hear you, there's no getting around the fact that the great Han Solo's last few moments alive were spent feeling epic physical pain and emotional heartache. Definitely a tragic end.
One of the reasons I might be okay with that goes all the way back to the style of ESB's legendary "Gone with the Wind" poster with Han and Leia mimicking the poses of Rhett Butler and Scarlett O'Hara. Do you remember how those characters' lives actually ended in GWTW? Their first child died when falling off a horse, their second child died of a miscarriage when Rhett pushed Scarlett down the stairs, they divorced, and then *don't* reconcile in their iconic final scene together. And while I've never particularly cared much for GWTW the film the relationship shared by the two main characters resonated with audiences for decades. And despite the summer (now Christmas) popcorn escapism of the SW Saga Han and Leia have never been too far removed from Rhett and Scarlett at least in my mind, so I can respect and even appreciate how things played out even if the sentimental side of me wishes things could have been different.