Thanks! Pretty crazy. I never even stopped to think about how it is actually a long term relationship. Just usually take it day by day. Funny how it has outlasted both of our parents marriages already and we are barely trying.
Unconditional love, is it real?
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Thanks! Pretty crazy. I never even stopped to think about how it is actually a long term relationship. Just usually take it day by day. Funny how it has outlasted both of our parents marriages already and we are barely trying.
Bannister
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Bannister
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Thanks! Pretty crazy. I never even stopped to think about how it is actually a long term relationship. Just usually take it day by day. Funny how it has outlasted both of our parents marriages already and we are barely trying.
It's because you are so in love, time has flown by.
Love:
8: a score of zero (as in tennis)
8: a score of zero (as in tennis)
It's real. It just often goes one-way.
Bannister
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It's because you are so in love, time has flown by.
No, time just flies by no matter what you do.
It's probably the fact that no other girl wants to not get married or have children as much as I don't. Those are my conditions...
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It's probably the fact that no other girl wants to not get married or have children as much as I don't. Those are my conditions...
That is like the tagline to a bad romantic comedy: "No one wanted to get married or have a child less than this couple..............until she got pregnant."
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That is like the tagline to a bad romantic comedy: "No one wanted to get married or have a child less than this couple..............until she got pregnant."
Oh god nooooooooo!!!!!
I need a vasectomy stat!
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creecher
Such is Life - Ned Kelly
The only grey areas in life are those you do not have to procrastinate over. Once you have your mind set, things become black and white. Even then you still have to decide whether it could be black or could be white. To complicate things more, you can later swap black for white or go back to grey.
Best friends get unconditional love. Dog is mans best friend. The rest are second best so love is conditional.
Best friends get unconditional love. Dog is mans best friend. The rest are second best so love is conditional.
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creecher
Such is Life - Ned Kelly
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Yes. Does everyone experience it? Nope. Even when you have kids people won't experience it because as the kid gets older then it can change. Unconditional is unconditional, its a constant you can't go through bouts of unconditional. The reality more people will go without or strive it so hard that the cynicism breds fantastically and so it seems like an abstract and stupid concept but it exists.
Dusty
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Quoted for truth.
My son could do the most horrible thing(s) in the entire world and I would still love him with all my heart. I'd be incredibly heartbroken and sad and I wouldn't defend his actions, but I would still love him.
Of course, some parents just don't feel that. I will never forget Dax's month in the NICU and one of his 'roommates' whose parents abandoned him there. He was a tiny 3-pound preemie and his parents just couldn't deal with that. I do NOT understand that and I hope karma comes back and bites them on the ass
Anzik
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I remember one day when my son was being down on himself about something and I said I loved him and always will. He replied that I only loved him because he was my son. I quickly corrected him and explained to him that it was true that I loved him because he was my son, I also loved him because of the person he is, the kindness he shows, the way he rationally thinks through many issues, how eager he is to help and earn things instead of just asking for them.
My kids are good. They have their issues but overall they are very good, well behaved kids and as such I only know that I love my kids as they are. I can say that hypothetically I would love them regardless, but I don't have that perspective. Since I have never been in a situation where my adult child has done something so heinous and despicable that it would nullify my ability to care for them.
After all, I think we can agree that there are some that are totally undeserving of love, John Couey who abducted, raped, and murdered by burying alive Jessica Lunsford. He has a mother and a father. I don't know how anyone can love someone after knowing what they did.
My kids are good. They have their issues but overall they are very good, well behaved kids and as such I only know that I love my kids as they are. I can say that hypothetically I would love them regardless, but I don't have that perspective. Since I have never been in a situation where my adult child has done something so heinous and despicable that it would nullify my ability to care for them.
After all, I think we can agree that there are some that are totally undeserving of love, John Couey who abducted, raped, and murdered by burying alive Jessica Lunsford. He has a mother and a father. I don't know how anyone can love someone after knowing what they did.
Dusty
just me
Yup.
If anyone believes love is something that is static and unchanging they are dead wrong. As John Lennon said "Love is a flower" that you have to tend and nourish.
But that IS unconditional love though, isn't it? Meaning "I'm willing to do whatever it takes to make this relationship (be it marriage, child, dog, etc) continue because I love this person" - BUT if the other person doesn't feel that way, that's not your problem. The love exists for you and even if you choose to leave that relationship (or the other person chooses for you), that doesn't mean you don't love that person any less. It just means that you realize that that person doesn't value the relationship (or life, in the case of a murderer) as much as you do, so you are making the choice to leave - or having the choice made for you.
I guess it really boils down to your personal definition of unconditional love. I have been in 2 past relationships where I can honestly say that I still love the person I left. Leaving was INCREDIBLY hard, and I still love them to pieces - but they were both unwilling to grow and change with the relationship, so I would argue that they didn't love ME. I was giving and giving and giving, and they were doing all the taking. They were in the relationship for convenience - I was in it for love. If they had also been in it for love, they would have been willing to compromise and adapt WITH me, as I was willing to do so with THEM.
And once I realized that, it was much easier to finally find a healthy and loving (unconditionally, on both sides) relationship. Now, if one of us goes crazy and decides to cheat or run away (or heaven forbid, kill someone), I'm sure that will split us apart in many ways, but the love we had together will still be there.
Plus, we have a child together, and if you are mentally healthy and willing to love each other unconditionally (even if your wife is throwing a fit for no reason - ha!) that goes a LONG way toward strengthening a relationship and moving it toward the unconditional kind - at least in my mind
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